Devil's appointment

Though the Mind May Be Wrong

    A few years ago we had an interesting conversation, we still remember the details of it - Looking back at it now, maybe it was a life-altering experience - but let's skip the nonsense, let us see where it started... With whom you may ask, back then it was clear that the answer was the devil himself, yet still now and then, the both of us think of him as the origin of evil, the force that cursed us into what we're now.

   Just a stupid kid, who didn't know how to fit in the crowd... We wanted to though... We didn't know why, but still, deep inside we wanted to be special around everyone, wanted to be unique in any way possible...... He started thinking over and over again, slowly that kid found himself drowning in this shallow lake,  stuck in the center of it, there's no way out, or that's the lie we sold ourselves, we dressed it as the absolute truth didn't we?....... It's funny that getting over this seems unreachable, all he wanted was things to end in a snap - told you he was stupid -, in that lake…All he desired is to breathe nothing but answers, still, that effort was meaningless, his lungs were full of questions......They just keep getting fuller it seems.….. With all it, the appointment is checked, we had no idea that all we needed is just a little push to what's coming next.

    Again some years have passed, things seem more blurred now... The kid learned a little bit more about life, he understood that life is more than just appearances, at least we realized that we don't need everyone's respect... We don't have to impress people that don't even know us.....From that day forward his attention drifted towards what's inside, the first moment he looked he had that funny feeling, everything within him knew that the puzzle is far away from being solved... In fact, every time we found a piece it feels like we just discovered a whole new separate puzzle..... Every time the kid gets a key to open a door, he sees nothing but a maze after walking inside….There was a seed planted in our core, and in that exact moment, it started to grow faster than we could ever cope with or even notice until we were stunned by the flower we saw that day when we knew that we were lost.

     The kid with the feeling of being lost, consumed by anxieties, insecurities, things he thought were normal, are things he has to hide now, all this start popping along the road like a lily of the valley... Things are getting out of control now... We convinced ourselves that running is our only option, right?.... Ignoring all the red flags, the kid built a safe room in his mind, not a single hurtful thing can touch him there, being scared of people is in his veins now.…… He found real happiness in creating imaginary conversations, step by step daydreaming became his reality..... Socializing is much harder now, talking to someone outside of his creation means he needs to imagine every way possible in which the discussions might lead, but weirdly nothing goes as he plans... Once again the world fails him... And he closed upon himself...not being able to let his guard down, even when he speaks to god.

      18 years now have passed since the day he took his first breath... Today he questions his purpose to breathe for the first time... All the emotions we had up to this point were unprocessed, we just kept digging that same hole for them deeper and deeper, eventually, we couldn't even see the bottom of what we created, every small thing that happened ended up thrown in there, no distinctions. we thought that we weren't able to see the bottom of our mistakes, therefore they would never spill out... Yet the bomb already started ticking and the time for our confrontation is here...

      The kid was all alone in his house - he had this habit where he would lie down, and staring at the ceiling for hours - yet today wasn't one of those days... Today was slightly different, an unexpected company came to visit, a company that wasn't invited all though it found its way in. The kid remained calm, his feelings were numb, his instincts were telling him that this is not his first time with the thing before him... Somehow he felt like they met before, he couldn't recognize that thing's features. Everything was black in black... Not even the torch in this thing's position was able to reflect any facial expressions from it, a pure abyss with a magical relaxin aura attracted the little kid, his eyes were fixed on that thing, for the first time he knew how it feels to be in front of a holy angel... Yet what he sees is never-ending chaos. the only words that found a way out of the kid's mouth were “this must be the devil”...

“Yes” That thing answered while putting the torch in front of the kid.