BAU BITCHES
Chocolate Thunder: I have a confession...
Angelface: Me too...
SugarTits: Do I look like a fucking priest?
Bau Milf: Did y'all hook up?
Angelface: EW NO GROSS I WOULD NEVER HOOK UP WITH BALDIE
Chocolate Thunder: no no no no no no that would be like fucking my cousin
SugarTits: Sweet home Alabama <3
Angelface: nah I'm from Cali, I saw a lot of girls in bikinis growing up. Being bisexual is so fun <3
Bau Milf: I just heard something slam on the floor.
Bbygurl: Uh oh what did you both do?
BitchBoy: WHAT THE FUCK
BitchBoy: YOU SON OF A BITCH WHERE ARE YOU AT, Y/N?
Bau Dilf: Goddamnit, Y/N. What did you do?
Angelface: Hey, Morgan did it. I just came up with the idea.
Chocolate Thunder: Shhhh let's all just blame it on Y/L/N.
Angelface: What the fuck no
BitchBoy: THEY WROTE "Suck my toes, Pretty Boy! - Chocolate Thunder and Angelface" ON EVERY SINGLE PAGE OF MY FAVORITE BOOK
Bau Milf: Really guys? We're literally on a case rn. People are dying.
SugarTits: Reid, if you're wondering Derek is in room 103 and Y/N is in room 106
Angelface: EMILY FUCKING PRENTISS YOU DID NOT JUST TELL THE PIPECLEANER WHERE I'M SLEEPING
SugarTits: Revenge for making me think you got fired.
Angelface: STOP BANGING ON THE DOOR BITCHBOY
BitchBoy: LET ME IN
Angelface: I'll let you in, but before you decide to murder me I got you a new, signed copy to make up for the one I ruined.
BitchBoy: You did?
Angelface: Yeah, I'm not a complete asshole.
BitchBoy: Oh, well thank you.
Angelface: No prob, pipecleaner.
Bbygurl: #ship
BitchBoy: no.
Angelface: Penny, ily but stfu<3
Chocolate Thunder: I love her more.
Bbygurl: And I love you, my sweet
Angelface: Back off, SHE'S MY BABYGORL NOW
Chocolate Thunder: Respectfully, die :)
Bau Dilf: Can you guys please work on the case.
Bau Milf: I agree. Let's all do that.
2:43 am
Chocolate Thunder: Do y'all hear that?
Bau Dilf: Yes, someone's shower is on. The walls are thin.
Italian Stallion: Who is showering at 2 am?
Bau Milf: Idk. I'll go check people's rooms and ask them to stop.
SugarTits: Bae, ily but leave me alone I'm trying to sleep.
Bau Milf: HOLY SHITNOJKJBICHBIJAKSBHJBHUJBHN
Angelface: oops.
Bau Dilf: What happened?
Bau Milf: I- uhhhhhhhhh I don't wanna talk about it.
Angelface: She saw me walk out of the bathroom to check my phone and I was fully naked lol
BitchBoy: Ew gross.
Angelface: Don't act like you weren't in there with me.
Chocolate Thunder: EXCUSE ME? JJ IS THAT WHAT YOU SAW?
Bau Milf: No, I just saw her titties. He was in his room.
Bau Milf: Nice boobs by the way
Angelface: awwww ty bestie
Bau Dilf: Literally what the fuck.
Angelface: I can't sleep, so i'm gonna order pizza, anyone wanna join? I'm wearing clothes now.
Italian Stallion: At 3 in the morning?
Angelface: Yes.
Chocolate Thunder: omw, but the clothes aren't nessacary.
Angelface: Ew derek. I'm gonna pretend I didn't read that.
Bau Milf: I'm coming too, I would prefer you to be wearing clothes though.
BitchBoy: Me too
Chocolate Thunder: Foursome😋
SugarTits: Omg invite me
Bau Milf: No. No one is having a foursome.
Chocolate Thunder: You're right JJ, when we add Emily it's a whole ass orgy
Bau Dilf: You guys are ridiculous, I'm going back to bed.
YOU ARE READING
The Bau Groupchat
FanfictionI do not own any characters besides Y/N. If you have suggestions or ideas please let me know.
