Love from the streets (A Josh Hutcherson FanFic)

Chapter thirteen

Chapter Thriteen

“I’m going to worry about you because I want to make sure you’re okay,” Josh says as he grabs my hand.

                “But I’m fine. You don’t have to.” I buckle my seat belt and lean back. I catch Josh staring at me. “What?” I ask confused.

                “What’s wrong?” Josh asks.

                “Nothing,” I say, but I know he’s pretty much reading my mind. I know sooner or later he’ll find out about my suicide and stop me.

                “You seem suspicious,” Josh says.

                “How?”

                “Nothing. Never mind.” Josh buckles his seat belt. “What now?”

                Suddenly I know how I’m going to kill myself. “Home I guess,” I say, and Josh drives us back to his house. I hang around in my room for hours, waiting for night to come. The sun is just disappearing over the horizon when Josh calls me for dinner. I can’t really eat, not now. I force myself to though because I want some kind of actual fresh food before I die. I go to my room immediately after I finish dinner and watch as the sun disappears and the moon rises, revealing a few stars with it.

                There’s a knock on the door and Josh comes in. “You alright, Cory?” he asks.

                “I’m fine,” I say, but I know I’m really not.

                “You sure? You’ve been acting a little… out of character today.”

                “I’m just tired.”

                Josh kisses my head, and bids me goodnight. I wait until midnight comes to start my suicide attempt. I grab a piece of paper and pen from a drawer and write a note to Josh:

Josh,

I’m really, really sorry. But I think it’s better if I just left. I don’t think anything will stay like this and I don’t want to have to put you through so much trouble with me anyway. You’ll be away from me for months at a time, with photo shoots and premiers and auditions and interviews all in between. So why bother? Why have us miss each other so much all the time? I think it’s best if I just left for good. If you need me, I won’t be with you physically, but I will, I hope, be in your heart. You’ll be my last thought. I promise. My last words will be for you: “I love you. And thank you for everything.”

-Cory

I fold the paper, and take with me to Josh’s room. I put my ear to the door quietly, and listen. I can hear him snoring softly. I quietly open the door and put the note on the nightstand beside his bed. I quickly leave, and start jogging to some cliffs Dad once showed me on one of my birthdays. I stand at the edge for at least ten minutes, looking down the whole time, trying to get used to the height. Five minutes pass and I end up sitting on the edge, letting my feet dangle over the edge.

                “Just jump, Cory,” I tell myself. “Josh can move on. Besides, he doesn’t you. He can get another girl easily. Just jump, Cory.”

                Why can’t I do this? I really thought I could. “Just suck it up, and jump. Act like you’re about to steal from somewhere new and you’re getting over the fear of that menacing looking owner.”

                The feeling is similar, but the suicide is much stronger. “Suck it up and jump!!” My voice echoes throughout the cliffs. I stand up, and take another look down. It’s not an idea; height for death, but it’s definitely high enough to kill me. I hear a car door slam shut behind, and I turn around. I see Josh just standing there in the moonlight. I know he’s too shocked to move.

                “I love you,” I say to him.

                “No! CORY STOP!” Josh screams for me, but I jump headfirst before he reaches me. Suddenly, there’s a hand on my ankle, and I look up to see Josh trying to pull me up. I start kicking at him so he can let go but his grip only gets tighter. Josh grabs my other ankle, and starts pulling me up. I quickly wiggle out of the boots, and start falling to my death.

                First is the impact, which sends an immense, searing pain throughout my whole body. Then there’s the death, which starts with a light, an easing of the pain, and then nothing.