The River In Reverse

No Regrets

Ned

'... I'm not a perfect man despite what some might think, you of all people would testify to that. I have things that I fucked up in life because I'm human and human beings do that. I have regrets... quite a few' he said on the phone whilst sitting in the bar.

It was the summer of 1989 and Ned sat in the parking lot hospital holding a bouquet of flowers with his heart racing rapidly.

"Hold On" by Wilson Philips whilst blaring on the radio of the rental car that he had gotten from the airport. It was only when he summoned the courage did he decide turn off the radio.

He was nervous as he left the car entering the Tower of Joy hospital and asking the doctor what room she was in. It was funny thinking what led him here

His life had always been set by his father ever since he was born and he had lived up to what his father wanted him to achieve.

Worked hard enough in Winterfell Prep, Primary and High before heading to the Vale for University. Everything was on track for Ned with regards to his career but then things had changed. Brandon had died an accident, some failure with the engines. Someone had to continue the Stark political machine after his father and it had to be him.

Arranged marriages weren't still a thing but the Tully's were an advantageous match that Father had fostered an alliance with. He had always tried to please his father and agreed to the marriage. Something that wasn't hard to swallow at the time.

Catelyn was beautiful and he didn't have much experience with girls so he married her but during his final year he wanted to live a little. Since his life would be tied to a family and a life of politics he had enrolled in an exchange program in the Riverlands. Funnily enough his father was the one who helped him get in, he got into the college there and that's when he met Ashara.

You could probably guess the rest of the story. He had fallen for Ashara the moment he saw her, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes upon, men on campus constantly tried to gain her attention. Ned didn't think he had a chance with her and he had a wife so when they were paired together in class; he didn't immediately make his interest in her known unlike the countless number of men, it had endeared him towards her and she had fallen for him.

They had fallen in love and she had gotten pregnant months after Catelyn had as well.

A true mess.

And that had led him to where he was right now earning death glares from both Alaric and Arthur Dayne who scowled at him but let him through regardless.

Walking inside he saw a sight that made him happy, Ashara holding their little babe who was clothed in a towel and was looking all around the room.

'Named him Jonathan-Snow, after my favorite author' she said.

'Jonathan Stark is a good name' he replied with a smile but Ashara didn't smile back, eyes that were so loving and sweet months ago were now dark and cold.

'His name is Jonathan Dayne. He is not a Stark and is my son and my son alone' she said firmly.

'Ashara please don't do this, I love you and our boy. I want us to be together. I know I hurt you and I am sorry but I don't love Catelyn, I care about her sure but I don't love her like I love you' he declared fiercely. 'Come with me to Winterfell, we will find a nice home and raise Jon there.'

Sitting on her hospital bed he saw her waiver slightly, his words still having some effect on her but she snapped out of it as soon as Jon murmured.