the good boy gone bad

his eyes.

I continue on with my day as usual, dragging myself to lectures and classes, making rude remarks to people in my head. A year left until I graduate, it's a matter of holding on for that long. I sit down at my desk and I wait for the lecturer to arrive, I remove my books from my backpack when my phone vibrates, it's a message from Kallie. "Xander keeps asking about you, is there something I need to know?" My eyebrows lift at the message, 'What exactly is she implying?' I ask myself. I smirk at the message, I start typing a reply back, "I haven't even spoken to him and I told you, not my type." She instantly reads the message and replies, "Hmm, anyway, you're coming to the mall with us after class." I don't bother to reply to the message as I barely have a choice in this situation. Part of being in a group that basically runs the school and every student in it, is that you're present for every occasion, function and boring party that gets hosted.

The bell sounds and I'm dismissed, outside, Kallie and the group is waiting for me already. The group consists of Layton, Elise, Sara, Nate and Jace. Layton and I have known each other for a while now, we tried dating once but we recently agreed to stay 'friends', I assume I was too much to handle, at that point in my life, I hit rock bottom and I assumed dating Layton would lift things off my shoulders for a bit, but it ended up making everything so much worse for myself. His love language is physical affection and mine isn't, that really affected him in the long run and when I broke it off with him, he wouldn't stop blaming himself for not being able to fix a broken girl.
Layton looks down at me and says, "You look good, Zaiharya." "Zay," I say back to him. He lifts a little smile for me and tells the group that we're ready to leave. We all walk out of the gates, laughing and parading as usual, Kallie speaks out loudly, “Oh guys, I'm done with Xander. He spoke to me this morning and wanted to break things off because I was getting in the way of his soccer trials. Like, what the fuck? Soccer? Over these?” She says as she grabs her own breasts.
Layton asks me if I'll ride with him instead of being cramped in Kallieʼs bicycle car, I laugh at her and agree to meet them there.
Him and I hop into the car and he asks, "Want to listen to anything in particular, Zay?" "No, not really, there is something I want though," I remark. He lifts up his one eyebrow as I take his left hand and place it on my thigh. "Squeeze."
He does as I say, and I feel pleasure already. Some might say I use Layton for when I need it, which is not completely true, he's kind to me but everytime I look at him, I don't necessarily see my whole future in his eyes, some might say that's what love is. He smiles at me and shakes his head. He keeps his hand on my thigh for the remainder of the drive until we pull into the parking of the mall. I grab my phone and we see Kallie and the others waiting for us already. As I hop out of his, I feel a warm spank on my behind, I roll my eyes at Layton and tell him to stop getting distracted. He laughs at me and wraps his arm around my back before Kallie runs over to me and tangles her arm in mine, pulling me away from Layton, "Nate kissed my cheek in the car! He said he missed me and I better sit next to him at the table." She says all of that in a high pitched squeak. "Weren't you just in love with Xander a few hours ago?" I ask. "Ugh, screw Xander, who cuts a girl off to focus more on soccer? Dickhead." Kallie walks with me for the remainder of the journey into the mall, she speaks on how blind she's been towards Nate, and how he's apparently the one for her. We have this conversation atleast twice a week, just with different guys.
We continue walking until we reach our spot, it's on the outside of the mall. It's where all the teenagers hang out, to get drunk and high and have sex on the walls. My group and I have our very own spot, 4 couches, on either side of each other and a round coffee table in the middle of them all.

Nate sits first and Kallie places herself on his lap, she opens her eyes wide at me and looks down. I mouth to her, "Is he hard?" She nods violently and we start laughing wildly. Elise, Sara and Jace sit on the other couch, getting comfortable while Layton and I share the one opposite them. I lay on the couch and put my legs over Laytonʼs. Nate pulls out a bottle of vodka from his bag and asks, "Who's first?" Everyone raises their hands and starts screaming, "Me! Me!" I'm the only one who doesn't. Layton looks at me, "Are you drinking?" "You know I don't drink." He nods his head while I pull out a pack of cigarettes from my pocket. I take a cigarette out of the box while Layton lights it for me, I ask if he wants a drag but he says, "You know I don't smoke." I start laughing at his response. Of course I'm not in love with Layton but I think I would do almost anything to protect him.

"Oh guys, I invited a friend of mine to chill with us as well, let me go fetch him," Jace says while Kallie and I exchange looks. The rest of us continue laughing and they continue drinking, already drunk. Kallie says to us, "How's a game of Never Have I Ever? But, if you haven't, you have to do it within this group." "Ou, okay, that sounds like a  good idea," Layton replies. “Oh by the way, what's going on between you two forbidden love birds?” Nate asks, pointing eyebrows at Layton and I. I reply with a dry, “Nothing,” at the same time Layton responds with, “Too much to say.” The atmosphere drops and I do not bother looking in his direction because I can already feel how tense the air is because of our polar opposite replies.
Jace walks back in with his friend by his side, Xander. "Everyone, you know Xander, Xander you know everyone," Jace introduces. Xander keeps his eyes on my legs on top of Layton, clearly disturbed and confused, he greets everyone except me. I pull out another cigarette from the box and start looking for my lighter. Layton holds it up and lights for me. Xander wears this adorable cardigan, church shoes and a watch that makes his veins pop out. "Hey guys, how's it going?" He asks everyone as they all reply. He keeps his eyes on me, staring straight into my soul and making me shiver. "How was the service, pastor's kid?" I joke around the group and everyone erupts in laughter. Jace must notice his friend's hurt expression and replies,"Ugh, don't pay attention to her, certified bitch alert." Xander laughs uncomfortably and sits down on the single cough, twiddling his thumbs.

"Want a shot?" Kallie asks him. "Oh no, I've never drunk alcohol before," Xander replies, shaking his head. "Aw, how cute, the baby doesn't drink," I say, making everyone laugh. As soon as I said that, he grabs the drink out of Layton's hand and gulps it down. Everyone is left in shock but all I do is smile at him. "So, everyone, we're playing Never Have I Ever, but if you haven't, you do it with someone in the group," Nate says, rubbing Kallie's thigh. Xander sits down and says, "Oh, that sounds exciting." I smirk at him, "Oh no love, we don't play the same way everyone else does, we take it to an extreme level, Kallie start it off." Kal winks at me and says, "Never have I ever made out with a girl who's straight." We start giggling, and I put a finger down. We all look at Elise, knowing she's only kissed guys. "You and Sara, go," I say to them. "What? No, I'm straight," Sara exclaims. "That's the point, honey," Kallie replies to her. Elise and Sara make eye contact, contemplating the dare. Sara leans in and Elise grabs her by her throat, shoving her tongue down. Sara flinches but goes along with it like a professional. "Okay, okay ladies, that's a wrap, " Nate says, breaking them up as we all chuckle.

A few rounds go by and Xander is the only one who hasn't played yet. "Let's give one to Xander, Never have I ever shotgun kissed," Jace says. "Wait, what's a shotgun kiss?" Xander asks. We all start giggling and Sara explains, "You inhale smoke from someone's else's mouth while kissing them." "Zai is the only one who smokes though?" Jace says. "That's the point, Xander, you know what you have to do," Kallie says while I see the hesitancy in Xanderʼs eyes.