𝐥𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭.

16

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𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓
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"um, s-shiloh? can we be partners?"

the boy in the white, long-sleeved crop top with princess sleeves looked up, his long faux lashes batting as he glanced up at the blonde boy standing before him. his glossed lips spread into a smile that made the boy in front of him redden before he cleared his throat.

"i'm sorry," the boy apologzed sheepishly, scratching the side of his neck out of nerve. "but i'm already paired with jenna and kylie.. i'm sorry."
"oh," the blonde said, his green eyes widening with mortification as his pale face tinted red immediately. "okay, that's fine. next time?"
"sure!" shiloh agreed, waving to him before with an exhale, he turned back to jenna with wide eyes.

"why do you always reject them?" jenna questioned, rolling her eyes before shiloh simply just shrugged, playing with the rose charm necklace around his neck. "there have been like five, this last week."
"i dunno." shiloh confessed before he ruffled his chestnut brown hair. something about the boy seemed undoubtedly fresher; like how clear his radiant skin was, or how beautiful his body looked in the slim-fitting clothes that he didn't usually wear.

perhaps it was because every single day after the ordeal that happened three weeks ago, he had locked himself in his room and sobbed until he had no tears left to cry; no tears that he could possibly even create with the thoughts running around in his head. he had cried, screamed, beat the wall with the pillow until he had slowly began to cope with the fact that the boy who still consumed his thoughts was a murderer.

after sorting out his own thoughts, shiloh supposed that he finally realized exactly why he was so hurt. the surprise of kaidon actually telling the truth had shocked shiloh beyond the emotional expansion that he could usually take, so much even that it had lead to him snapping.

he wasn't mad at kaidon; just scared, and disappointed. he claimed that he loved him, but how was he capable of love when he was also capable of murder? it was complexing, not to menton the possessive elements of the things that kaidon had said to him before they parted; it was too confusing. shiloh could not find any justification for murder in his pure heart, even if it was out of the name of some sick, twisted love or if it wiped an abuser from the face of the earth.

kaidon valentino simply was not who said he was; he had lied about who he was, so how was shiloh to know that he hadn't lied about the love that he had for him? how was shiloh to know that he wasn't a psychopath and that his life was next? that soon, he be dead just like ryan?

still, the thing that perhaps hurt shiloh the most, even with everything kaidon had done was that he had hurt him.

"i wish i never met you."

those were the words that swimmed around shiloh's mind that tended when he was not distracting himself with pushing his near malnourished body during practice, or doing homework or listening to music at an ear-splitting volume.

what hurt shiloh the most, to the core were those words; the fact that he had said them to the only person that he could ever trust, his only best friend, the only one there to hold him if he really tried to reach out.. the person he could sit and talk for hours with, even if he had commited those things.