Shades Of Kim||K.NJ (AMBW)

28

Wed. 25th May, 2022

Angel's POV

As my eyes fluttered open, I was greeted with the sun shining through the small creases of the window. I looked to my right to see Namjoon still asleep as he laid his head on my arm. Surprisingly he likes cuddles. The past few days, he slept comfortably with his hands wrapped around my waist as we faced each other resting his head on my arm. I couldn't help the smile that formed on my face as he looked adorable.

Ever since Sunday, I had this huge urge to be protective of him and I was also worried. That night, we just cuddled up and shared a few kisses in silence. On Monday, we had breakfast here in our hotel room and he said I could ask anything I wanted.

At first I was hesitant because I was still trying to process everything. How can some people be this fucked up and cruel? I had a very strong dislike towards both Jessica and Young-ho but now it's hatred. It might not be my business but when you hurt someone I love on purpose, that's what will happen.

Everything made more sense as to why everyone was so angry towards them. That's why Layla told me it was his choice. For him to come to me and tell me everything was probably scary for him. That's why my first question was why did he?

He explained that his therapist said involving the person he loved in his life would make him feel better. I asked if it did and he said yes. He said he didn't have to feel guilty about keeping it from me and that we could love each other fully.

He was right. Now that I know everything my love for him grew even more. I asked the next question about his scars. He explained each one of them like he was reciting a poem. It was a bit heart aching to hear him tell me everything but I listened. He also said that even though he had slept with Jessica and many other females, I was the first female to see his scars.

I was bit confused as to how but he said that sex always happened in the dark or his shirt was always on. They would question him but he made sure to distract their minds. I knew what he meant immediately and changed the topic. I may know about his past flings but it wasn't nice to hear.

Onto my next question, I asked how did Seokjin find out that he was being abused. He explained that because Seokjin was in college and focusing, he didn't really come around much to see anything which made it easier for him to hide it. Eventually his father stopped and just took control over his life choices. Seokjin only found out about the abusing two or three years ago. It made me sad to hear that and now I understand why Seokjin really hates his dad.

My next question involved his mother. He explained that after she left they would speak with her regularly but the calls stop after a year. He asked his father why Young-ho was hesitant in answering. Overtime, both Jin and Namjoom gave up on trying to find their mother. Of course, Jin knew more about their mother's disappearance but Namjoon didn't bother to ask. I understood why he didn't pester about his mother. He was already accepting that his mother wasn't going to be a part of his life so it was easier for him not to know anything.

My last question involved what was his goal doing all of this? He was silent for a few seconds but he gave his answer. To be at a mental peace. He said for years he was being haunted and tortured mentally. Even though he made the decision to start therapy only recently, he always considered it. He said he hated how hurt everyone was because he didn't want to become his father.

That was also hard to hear. For him to even compare himself to such an evil person pissed me off. Namjoon wasn't perfect but he was nowhere near Young-ho. They say children take after their parents but Seokjin and Namjoon proved that saying wrong. He also added that he had to face his fears and that included his mom.