Until That Time {h.s au}

chapter three

~Harry Styles~

They say there are moments in your life that change the course of it forever. Something as simple as leaving for work five minutes early or something as big as moving halfway around the world in search of something new. These moments could be great things, the birth of your first child or the day of your wedding. Moments that are filled with love and laughter that make you want to freeze time and stay there forever.

For others, these moments are devastating. They take the human being that was once inside and destroy it entirely. Leaving the person feeling so broken, they feel with everything inside of them that they will never be okay again.

The night of the accident played in my mind like a constant. No matter how hard I tried, the sounds of the ambulance's sirens blaring in my ears as my sobs echoed through the air took control and never allowed me to look back.

That was my moment.

The moment of pure and utter despair, the one that I thought I would never recover from.

But then I met her.

The sun's bright light blinded me when I opened my eyes, the sound of doctors hustling around the hallways as nurses conversed with one another. I kept my eyes closed for a moment, because the mornings are the easiest. For those few seconds, I wake up and I don't remember what happened, I think she will be there. Sitting at the kitchen table eating the same stupid omelet she would eat every morning, pushing her fork in my face as she begs for me to finally try it.

But then I remember. I remember that she isn't here anymore, that she wouldn't be eating her breakfast. There wouldn't be another meaningless fight that had us both too stubborn to apologize. There wouldn't be random movie nights, one of us wrestling to get to the best spot on the couch. She wouldn't kick me when I fell asleep, complaining how she knew she shouldn't have let me pick the movie because I always fell asleep after the first five minutes.

She wouldn't be there to tell me off when I was being a dick. Scolding me with her motherly nature that I used to find overbearing and annoying, but there isn't anything I wouldn't give for her to mother me again. She wouldn't be there when I went to bed at night, asking me for the hundredth time if I had taken my medication. She simply wasn't here anymore.

All because I was too careless with my life to even think about hers.

I sigh quietly, finally allowing my eyes to flutter open before I noticed a figure sitting on the couch in the corner of my room.

She had her hair pulled up again, the same way she had the first night I was here as her slight fringe hovered over her eyes. She hadn't even noticed I was awake because she had her head buried into her book. She was sitting cross legged, her black sweat pants rolled at the bottom as a pair of white socks hugged around her small feet. She had on the same knit cardigan, the fabric three sizes too big on her as a shirt with the words "World's Greatest Grandpa" hung loosely on her body.

Her thumb was in her mouth, biting her nail as she clutched the book in her hand. I decided not make a sound, not wanting to disturb her as she was almost finished with her book. She seemed as though she was in another world. Her eyes scanning the pages so quickly it was exciting to watch. I had never been a big reader, but something about the way she was so fascinated with the literature in front of her made me want to pick up the book and read it for myself.

When she finished it, I quickly closed my eyes. Not wanting her know I had been watching her as I counted silently in my head. Once I hit fifteen, I opened my eyes and slowly moved around the bed, signaling that I was awake.