Wonderland (Kaneki x Touka)

Kaneki

I had gotten everyone back to safety, at least. That was something, right? I'd managed to save everyone but myself. This had been expected. I felt the rain battling my tears on my face, and I took a deep breath.

I would never see Touka again, would I? The blood from my stomach seemed intent on proving my thoughts correct. My body refused to move. The quinque was still inside me, and didn't seem to want to come out. I wasn't healing, just slowly dying.

Hinami had smiled. I'd seen her smile before I'd died. I had something to smile about, during my time. Sir had promised not to let Touka come after me. I was holding him to that. The others had all waved, given small smiles. But I was grateful to each and every one of them.

Some offered to stay behind, but I thought I could make it over to Aogiri in time. Obviously I was wrong. I took a deep, gut wrenching breath and tried to still my racing heart. I wasn't sure if I was happy about dying, not just yet. I wanted to go, but I had so much to stay for.

Touka. For love.

To live as a normal human being.

Right then, in that moment, I had to fight even harder. My kagune was no use, and would only force me up higher on the quinque. The owner of this particular quinque had taken off after stabbing me in surprise. It'd taken a lot to get it through my flesh, but they'd managed - and then they hadn't stuck around to see if it'd actually done any damage. I yanked on the blade, screaming as it slid back down into my flesh. Shit. When this thing came out I could begin healing, and my blood would stop flowing out of me like a red river.

I needed it to come out. I heard a small cry, and then the quinque was gone. The hole in my body made my eyes widen. I just lied in the snow, refusing to look at my savior. Her scent was too familiar to be mistaken, anyway.

"You lied to me." I whispered to the spirit of the old man. He'd promised not to let Touka come after me. Bastard. "Kaneki, oh god... why?" She sobbed, her hand gripping mine. "Because I had to.. have to save everyone." I nodded to myself.

"No. You don't. Everyone is safe! You did your job!" She cried, her eyes pleading with me. "Oh that's not true, Touka. You know that."

"Kaneki please. Who else is there?"

"I need to fight, Touka."

"Kaneki!" Her tears dripped down onto my hand as she kissed my knuckles. "I won't let you fight."

"You can't stop me." I said coldly. Her sobbing grew louder as she slid the quinque back into my partially healed wound. I screamed, over and over as she pushed it in further before drawing it out.

"Why?" I asked, tears flowing from my eyes.

"You can't fight if you're wounded." She whispered.

"You're doing this to save me?"

"I have to save you."

"No." I shook my head wildly, the pain shooting through my body over and over. "No you don't. Not like this." My wound began to close after around thirty painstakingly long minutes. I sat up, the blood had stopped flowing.

"I have to go." I said, slapping the quinque out of her hands. I slid my mask on once more, and then I took off.

The pain was incredible, but it would be nothing compared to what happened next. "Kaneki!" Her scream tore through me. "Stop! That hurts! Kaneki!" She was trying to fight off a cannibal ghoul. Someone was trying to kill her; and I was about to turn my back on her? Could I do it?

Could she fight if I left her?

I needed to figure this out. My thoughts were scattered, but Touka had to come first. If she died then there was nothing left for me. I needed to save her, because she was my everything. I tackled the cannibal off of her, a small whimper escaping as a chunk of her leg was ripped out of her. My kagune whipped around, and stabbed him through the neck before tearing off his head.

Fast and efficient.

"Touka. Go back to where everyone else is. Please."

"I won't go without you." She said, limping over to me.

"You can't fight doves like this, Touka." I gestured to her body. She was also maskless. "If I have to go back there alone then I won't go back there at all."

"Touka for once in your life will you please just listen to me?!" I snarled at her, unzipping my mask. I shoved her softly. "I need you to get the hell out of here." I growled at her. I was on a fuse, and that fuse had long since hit the bomb. It was two seconds away from exploding.

"Kaneki..." I shoved her, and this time it was not soft. She hit the ground, staring up at me. "Get out of here." I snarled. "I don't need your help. I don't want your help. You're not strong enough to fight out here alongside me." I was spouting nonsense to get her out of here. My panic had turned to fear, and my fear had boiled over to anger, and they had combined together to make this rage. One where I would only cool down if my objective had been reached.

That was Touka - getting the hell out of here and getting her ass to safety. "I see how it is." She stood up, brushing herself off. She stared up at the clouds as the rain began to pelt against her harder and harder.

"I'll see you at the hotel." She said, pulling the jacket around her tighter. Something felt off as I watched her limp away. Something was wrong.

"Touka..." I started, but I couldn't think of a way to put my fear into words. This feeling was unnatural.

Something terrible was going to happen, and I just knew it would happen to Touka. I didn't know what it was, but I just prayed I was there when it happened. I had to save her. I couldn't let her go back alone, could I? I heard screams around me. I needed to let her go, for once. She was strong enough to take care of herself, at least.

Right?