Athena

26. I Want To Be Bothered

Throughout my afternoon classes, I keep texting Cruz under my desk. I'm worried out of my mind. I'm feeling insanely guilty as well.

Every time Cruz texts me back, he insists that he's fine.

I don't know if I believe him.

For the rest of the day, I spend my time brainstorming ideas over how to make this shit situation a little less shitty.

By fifth period, I decide that I'm going to buy Cruz a new laptop: To replace the one his dad smashed because of my stupid prank. To thank him for everything he has done for me. To say sorry for getting him involved in a fight today.

By sixth period, I learn from Cruz's latest messages that he ended up getting a two-day in-school suspension after his trip to the vice principal's office. The outcome isn't as horrible as I expected, I suppose, considering the damage the guys caused. Cruz gave Brody another black eye and some bruised ribs, and Brody gave Cruz a cut lip and some badly scraped knuckles.

Cruz tells me that Brody was dealt the same punishment and that neither of them snitched on each other when Mr. Santos pressed them for the reason behind their fight.

As I sit in class, I start worrying about how Ron will react to Cruz's in-school suspension. I'm pretty sure this is the first time Cruz has gotten into trouble at school. I hope Ron won't lose his shit like last time, but I'm preparing myself for the worst. I mean, the guy threw an epic mantrum over a set of googly eyes. An actual suspension will probably give him a heart attack. I'm ready to jump in the line of fire if Rob decides to take his anger out on Cruz.

Other worries weigh on my mind as well: Chrissa's vicious threats. Brody's violent streak. I stress about Alison and her dad getting caught in the crossfire. Cruz already took a hard hit for me. Several of them, in fact. Literally.

Too much has happened in one day, and I don't really know how to process it all. By the time the final dismissal bell rings, I stop thinking altogether. I feel utterly drained.

I grab my backpack and head out to find Cruz. We're supposed to meet by his car. I arrive in the parking lot first. A few minutes later, I spot Cruz walking towards me. I'm relieved to see that, even though he looks a bit roughed up, he seems okay overall. Ms. Devlin, the school nurse, bandaged him up pretty well. I'm still not at ease, though.

What if Brody gave Cruz a concussion or something?

After we climb into his car, I ask, "Should we get you checked out at a clinic before heading home?"

Cruz shakes his head. "No, I'm good."

"You sure you don't have a concussion?"

"Doubt it. Brody may have punched me in the mouth, but he didn't get anywhere near my head."

I wince. "I see."

Cruz's eyes dart towards me as he drives. "Hey, don't worry. I'm gonna be fine. Ms. Devlin said everything should heal in a week or two, and I know how to change bandages on my own. It's all external shit, like, bruises and cuts. Although, if I start feeling weird, I'll have my dad take a look."

I guess he has a point. Ron is a doctor, after all. But guilt continues to claw at me.

I suggest, "Should we stop by a pharmacy? Do you need anything? Extra bandages? Some aspirin?"

Cruz assures me that they keep medical supplies at home for his soccer injuries.

I offer, "Then, let me help you."

His brow creases in confusion. "With what?"

"I dunno. Changing your bandages. Or whatever."

Cruz side-eyes me. "You wanna be my nurse or something?"