Goodbye, brother mine.

Chapter 4: The Heart Perceived.

Mycroft Holmes' Letter for Sherlock: (Continued)

A smile pulls on the corner of my lips and my face lights up. I had not thought about that day in ages. The flashback goes on and a new memory from your infancy resurfaces. You must have been a few months old. Mummy was in the kitchen and Dad was in town, running errands. I was sitting in the living room, reading William Shakespeare's 'Julius Caesar' while you were in your cot close by. Mummy had asked me to keep an eye on you as we had guests coming over in the evening and she was occupied with making dinner and doing other chores. You were an angel though; not needing any attention from me. Your complete focus was on trying to roll over on your stomach but you didn't know the technique yet. You would manage to lift one side of your body a few centimetres off the pillow before gravity proved too strong for you and you'd land on your back again. You gurgled at me now and again whenever I mumbled my appreciation for the depth of Shakespeare's verses, but other than that you were silent. All of a sudden, I heard you crying. I thought you had hurt yourself on the crib's barrier so I kept my book aside, got up from the sofa and made my way to your cot. I immediately saw what was wrong. You had managed to roll over on one side and your arm was trapped under your trunk. I gave a sigh of relief while stooping down to extricate your hand gently from under you and then, rolled you over on your back again. You were not crying anymore so I tried to straighten up but I felt a gentle tug on my finger. You had wrapped your tiny fingers around my forefinger and were clutching it tightly showing me that you had no intention of letting me go. I kneeled down besides your cot and you slackened your grip on my finger a little but you still didn't let go. You lifted your other hand to my hand and you pawed my hand, like a sculptor does to assess the structure before he starts on his sculpture. After a long exploration, you let my hand go. I placed it on your little chest and you squirmed a bit but then settled down. I could feel the faint beating of your heart. I tickled your small stomach and you giggled. It was the loveliest sound I had ever heard and I'd do anything to hear it again. I tickled you once more and you giggled again. I brushed away a stray ringlet of your hair from your eyes with my finger. Our eyes met and I could see the sparkle in your eyes. And then Sherlock, a miracle happened. You smiled at me. You had not smiled once before in past months and you chose this occasion to do it. It was not just any smile. You gave me a beaming dazzling smile which touched your eyes and showed your toothless gums. My eyes widened and I forgot how to breathe. I felt my heart blossom in my chest like a rose bud slowly unfolding it's petals to bloom into an alluring and fragrant flower. My chest swelled with every pure emotion I've felt for you but haven't been able to name. My jaw dropped. I wanted to call Mummy and show her this marvellous sight in front of me but I could not form any words. I just stared at you in wonder- wide eyed and open mouthed. "Good Lord, Mikey! He's got such a beautiful smile!" I jolted at the sound of Dad's voice and the spell you had cast was broken. I turned around to see him looking at us. He gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze and continued, "You'll be a wonderful brother, Mycroft. I know it. I can feel it in my heart." He glanced at Sherlock and then went to the kitchen to give Mummy the groceries; leaving me there, reflecting on everything that I was feeling. You giggled at me again and I smiled back at you. You kicked those little fleece clad feet of yours and held your arms skyward for me; a sign you wanted to be picked up. I plucked you out of your crib gently but securely and brought you to my shoulder. You cooed softly and your tangled coils tickled my ear. You lifted your head from my shoulder and leaned back a little as if you wanted to see my face. I instinctively moved my hand to support your back and prevent you from swaying back too much. You held your hands against my cheeks as if drawing my face closer. I leaned in a little and I just stood there with you propped up in my arms, our foreheads touching and your warm chubby hands caressing my cheeks. "My darling Sherlock, I promise you. I will always be there for you. All you need to do is ask for my help and I'll travel across the seven seas and we will face the world together. I love you. Never forget this, okay? I love you very very much." I whispered to you, my eyes filling up. I closed my eyes and placed a soft kiss on your forehead while a tear dribbled down my cheek. I held you in my arms close to my heart with my cheek resting on your head for a long time before placing you in your cot and going back to my book.