oneshots

The Doll

"I'm afraid your depression will make you blame yourself for this mishap.",

The last words of my aunt echo in my ears as fatigue shadows all over me, my torso sinking deep into the worn out sofa.
It is yet another night succeeding a series of woes afflicting pain upon my exhausted self.

I just returned from my aunt's funeral, and probably the only remnant heir of my family, second to me.

It hasn't been long; since all of this started.

The people who cared about me, the ones I loved, have been snatched away from me to the point I am as lonely as a satellite in a sky full of stars.

Now is just another night wherein I'm used to these calamities. With teenage, my life's peace also pressed its breakes today.
Yes, a birthday I would never forget.

In this boulevard of silence, my sole respite is...

him.

He who shares my solitude.
He who ushers me to the light.
He who never let go of my hand.

And he... whom I never saw.

I walk towards my cold bedstead with a small smile gliding along my lips; acquired from all these battles I've fought within myself.
Perhaps, it wasn't too lonely ever since he was here.

The moment I lay my body sideways on the mattress, his hand silently creeps on my waist. His grip is tight, as though suffocating, it provides a warmth I yearn for.
I feel his warm breath tingling on my numb skin as a sigh of relief escapes my lips.

Neither do I turn to face him, nor does he say a word.

Sometimes I wonder if he is even real, or just in my imagination; But his shuffling mien tells otherwise.
Nevertheless, I never dare to question his presence, since he provides my wretched heart, a grim sense of comfort.

I let out a deep sigh giving in to the cuddle, a blush playing on my cheeks as a result of intimacy.
His quiet nuzzling into my hair makes me want to turn around and glance into his eyes, just how normal couples stargaze even in yonder daylight.
But I'm afraid,
good things end when you grasp in greed.

Before darkness curtains my eyes, I need to clarify the ambiguity of my feelings.
Maybe if I do that, I shall get to see his inscrutable countenance.
His purpose of being here.

So I muttered,

"I don't know if you're an boon to me, or something who's here to take more away...

But having you makes me want to return to my bed every night."

Just like every night, his reply is a deafening silence; but it eases me rather than having to loose sweat awaiting upon an affirmation.

As if it was a cradle, his embrace lulls me into a deep slumber.
.

.
Unlike most others, this morning, I wake up to the sound of birds chirping upon the threshold of my glass window rather than a phone call regarding a relative's demise.
What remains unaltered is his absence from my bed and untracebly, from my life, for a whole day.
It is only darkness whence he appears.

Today is rather pleasant;
for I know I will not receive bad news.

All my family is gone.

College is no more.

I had to quit my job as well.
Things look messed up....but at least
I could clean my room.

Cleaning of what took about three hours, absorbed my time handsomely. Though I'll admit my house looks quite the opposite of my mental state, but in the words of my therapist,

"A pristine mind blossoms from detangled surroundings."

It all starts from home.

"Try cleaning your house, and you'll see what difference fresh bedsheets make to your life."

So I am doing as she said.
Changing pillow covers, curtains and rugs, of my entire small universe, which consisted of just a limited four walled apartment.
It was enough to get by alone.

Just as I was about to mop under my bed, I see something opaque at the far end. It looks like a toy.
But I remember, I left all my toys at my deceased parents' house.
What would I do with toys when life was toying with me.

Pulling it out of darkness, I identify it as a weird old figurine mysteriously residing within my abode.
Tossing it over to the back side, my heart thumps loudly as I see the fragile little object unwrapping mercilessly onto the floor, dry straw reeds mixed with traces of hair falling all over the semi wet floor.
Just as it happened, a piercing pain shoots in my chest as
I unintentionally imitate its fall on the hard floor seemingly gasping for air.

No matter how hard I try to breath, it feels as if I am devoid of lungs.
As if there is just a void inside waiting to engulf me from within.

It did not take me too long to realize what it was, as horror envelops my entire body presenting a terrifying climax of death right before my eyes.
Just as quiet as wind outside,
I helplessly lay with a blurry eyesight.

There is absolutely nobody to share my solitude with now.
A single tear escapes my feeble eyes pitying my moribund state.

That's when it hit me,
The one who held me through my darkest nights, was a me created by someone else.
A me created for my own collapse.

__________________X___________________

A/n:

I know it's not a fanfiction, but I loved framing the plot.
Let me know how you like it🕯️