Surprising turn - a turn for the better? Or into madness ... (Draco Ff)

Chapter 13 ~ The burning on my forearm was answer enough.

Victoria's Pov.

I have been sitting here in the library for what feels like hours, but unfortunately I have not yet found a spell that is supposed to fix the vanishing Cabinet.
Draco felt the same way next to me.
If I was not mistaken, it was already the fifth day and also the fifth night that we spend here, looking and searching, but not finding anything useful.
Draco looked terrible, paler than usual, had bloodshot eyes that were adorned with deep shadows.
Even though I could guess I probably looked the same, I tried not to let the exhaustion and tiredness show me.
It would actually be time for dinner, but as usual we didn't go into the great hall.
Zabini has followed us several times because he wanted to know where we were, but he never found us, the friendship between Draco and him is already threatening to end, but unfortunately it is the case because Zabini most likely had no idea about  our job, and as long as Draco hasn't told him, it will stay that way.
I concentrate again on the open book in front of me. I had already read the page three times, but couldn't find the meaning behind it.
I was nervous at the end, but I won't give up anyway, that wouldn't be my style.
Once Dumbledore is dead, things could only go uphill, hopefully.
Back to the book.
It said something about the cabinet.

"A Vanishing Cabinet is a magical piece of furniture. It is a large cabinet that, if it functions correctly, can transport whoever enters it to the matching twin cabinet. It can also overcome magical wards like those at Hogwarts.
If one of the twin closets is not working or is broken, it should be placed in the care of a skilled wizard who can fix it.
If you are able to do this yourself, only the following spell is required ... "

Why did the universe always make it so difficult for us.
Why exactly is the rest of the text burned and torn out?
Out of sheer anger, I threw the still open book in the direction of Draco, who woke up from his reading trance.
He glares at me angrily, but I just pointed to the book open in front of him.
While Draco was letting go, I continued to sit forward in my chair and rest my head in my hands.
Out of nowhere I got a severe headache, so I massaged my temples, my body won't be able to withstand this stress for much longer.
When Draco put the book aside, he looked at me with hopeless and tired eyes.
“Vic, this is the only book of it, it is almost impossible to find another copy anywhere.
We won't make it, the Lord will kill, if not torture, and then kill us.  I can't do that anymore, how can someone want that of us? "
I sighed, got up and sat down on Draco's lap, realizing he was about to freak out.
Draco remained in his position, staring at the opposite wall.
I took his face in my hands and made him look at me.
What I saw hit me hard, the otherwise strong and emotionless Draco Malfoy was crying.
I wipe the tears away from him, leaned forward, our lips were only millimeters apart, but before I bridge them, I whisper “We can do this, together.  We survive, together.  We won't let ourselves get down, we'll find a solution. "
I put my lips gently on his as he returned the kiss, I smiled.
After we broke away from each other, breathing heavily, I heard a faint "I love you" and then had to smile.
We'd probably just sit there for a while, looking each other in the eye, until I realized it had to be very late.

"We should go, it's almost closed at night."
We went slowly down to the dungeons, nobody said anything.
The silence wasn't uncomfortable.
On the contrary, that is exactly what we needed now to clear our heads, although I know that worries haunted our dreams if we even got to sleep.
I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't realize that we were already standing in front of the dormitories.
I turned to Draco and kissed him goodbye.
"Good night," I whispered, "Good night, I love you," Draco replied.
I was already on my way to my dorm, but I noticed that Draco was watching me.
Before I went down the stairs I said "I love you too."
Then I was gone.

I was already in bed, but I couldn't sleep, just like when the worries disturbed my sleep and also affected my daily life.
After about two hours I dozed off from exhaustion, but I wasn't allowed to, because sometime in the middle of the night Draco stood in my dormitory and woke me up.
I looked at him asking, but the burning on my forearm was answer enough.
The lord called us.

Narcissa, Draco's mother, was already waiting for us in the entrance hall.
She hugged her son briefly, examined the two of us and said, "You look terrible, have you slept at all for the last few days?"
She didn't expect an answer at all, but pushed us forward with gentle force.
We were already sitting at the large table and waiting for the "Dark Lord" to come again.
When he came, I turned it off.  They only talked about the ministry they wanted to overthrow.
But then the Lord spoke to Draco, who suddenly turned even whiter than I thought was possible.
"And Draco, my dear boy, how's the Vanishing cabinet going?  Have you made any progress?  And don't answer anything wrong! "
Draco looked carefully in my direction, but I didn't move a muscle.
The Lord made Draco stand up and come to.
"You disappoint me, you are a disgrace, you will pay for it."
I wanted to get up and stand up too, because we're in there together, but Draco's gaze prevented me, he said something like ... "Stay there and not a word. Better me than you, I can do it."
I didn't believe him, I knew I was the stronger of the two of us, I'm mentally stronger than he ever would be, but I stayed silent.
The dark lord raised his wand and pointed it at Draco, Narcissa next to me tensed instantly and then he screamed.
Draco screamed so hard and loud as I've never heard it before.  He doubled over on the floor in pain, it looked terrible.
I had to do something, so I got up slowly, Narcissa wanted to prevent this, but I was not persuaded.
“STOP IMMEDIATELY, DRACO IS NOT THE ONLY PART OF THIS JOB.  I'M INTO IT AS DEEPLY AS HIM !!! ”
He really stopped, while I had yelled at him, I kept walking towards him, now I was only a few meters away from the two of them.
Draco was apparently doing just fine because he sat up and looked at me with a shocked expression.
I was afraid, I was terribly afraid, but I did not show it at all.  The dark lord raised the wand, pointed it at me and said: "CRUCIO"
When the curse hit me, I stood bravely.
No loud left my throat.
I stood steadfast, which was harder than it looked.
I wouldn't give Voldemort this triumph to scream in pain.
Not today.
I don't know how long he tortured me, I was already on my knees, but I still didn't scream.
Neither did I break eye contact between the Lord and myself.
I looked into his hideous red eyes and felt nothing but disgust.
Now it was getting too much for Voldemort because he threw me with "Stupor" against the wall of the room and disapparated away.
I didn't show anything and got up as if nothing had happened.  A laceration graced my temple, but nothing else was to be seen.
All the other Death Eaters also disappeared, Draco running towards me, followed by Severus Snape.
I went to meet them, every step ached and I grimaced.
"Victoria, better me than you, why did you do that?"
I thought about it and finally sighed, "As I said, we're in this together and now let's go."
Severus Snape took over the apparating and we were already standing in front of the entrance portal.
They parted ways inside, but before Professor Snape disappeared, he said, "Miss Lestrange, maybe you'd better go to the hospital wing and take Mister Malfoy with you too."
Of course, we didn't go to the hospital wing, but towards the common room.
Draco supported me, and that's how we made it to the Slytherin common room.  We sat down on one of the sofas and were silent.
Out of the blue, Draco hugged me and kissed me, but it hurt and I groaned in pain.
There was worry in his eyes and he let go of me.
I also kissed him briefly and leaned against him.
Sleep was out of the question, just as little as the days before.
We just sat there and thought about it, Draco playing with one of my black curls, but I, I couldn't get that one thought out of my head.

Draco won't be strong enough to kill Dumbledore.  Draco is just too weak mentally, he would never forgive himself for murdering.
So I'll do it, I'll kill Dumbledore at the end of the school year, but how do I make it clear to Draco that he won't make it?

I made up my mind, Dumbledore is going to die at my hand, I'll be a murderer.