Calculus

12. (Tobirama)

"I don't want you to go."

"I know. But I must."

"I don't want you to go."

His voice was a whisper. He hid his face on my bare chest, and I knew he tried to hide that he was crying.

"Izuna, look at me."

He did. He was completely naked, a rare treat so I tried to enjoyed every minute, every second. He had explained him sleeping clothed was because the sensation of the skin of his one leg rubbing against his other leg bothered him when he tried to fall asleep. He seemed very ashamed when he said this, but I hadn't even stopped to think about it. It was just the way he was, like the fact that he still counted his foods before he ate.

I put my fingertips to his precious face.

"I'm so scared you'll die", he said, his tears echoing his words.

"We have promised each other we won't go without telling the other. Remember?" I took his hand, kissed every fingertip. "On the cliffside. When we almost lost each other." I still shivered thinking about it. "I won't die. I love my life with you too much to ever let that happen."

That made him cry even more.

I held him for as long as I could before I had to get up and get dressed for the battle in the valley.

My horse struggled to stand still, but I tried to relax as much as possible in the saddle. I was always very carefully not to pull him in the mouth with my reins; many of my comrades did that, causing their horses to dislike having them mounted. My horse loved it when I rode him, and so did everything for me. It had saved my life many times. 

Izuna looked small yet royal where he stood next to me. The crown prince and his personal guard becoming close wasn't unusual, so there was no strangeness in us bidding farewell, although I wished so I could kiss him just once more.

"Do you have my invention with you?" he asked.

"Of course, my prince."

I reached my hand down, and he took it. Immediately, he squeezed three times, and I squeezed three times, too.

"I will be back", I said. 

I turned my horse around and cantered away, putting on my helmet in the speed, making me and my brown, large horse indiscernible from the rest of the soldiers.

Izuna had asked for a few days to think about something to help us fight off the enemy that would come after us through the cleft. For that to work, we needed to be on the battlefield half a day earlier than the battle would take place. He had invented something he called "electricity mines". It seemed incredibly out of characters that he would create a killing device, and when I voiced that concern, he had smiled.

"Oh, you just wait. You will understand."

The valley where the battle was held was vast and surrounded by cliffs on three sides, meaning you entered it from the open part. In the cliff opposite the open part was the cleft. Since we came first, the enemy would have us against the wall, and it was vital that we switched sides with them, like castling in chess. 

I was part of the soldiers fighting the main battle, so I didn't help digging the electricity mines down in the cleft. That was the job of the soldiers going up the hill for the ambush, burying the mines as they walked or rode through the cleft to reach the ambush point. They were finished just on time, having laid the last mine when we heard the horn of the enemy army. Two minutes later, we could discern the army at the horizon on the open side of the valley opposite the cleft. Despite myself, I could feel a tingle of excitement run down my arms, and I was somewhat glad Izuna wasn't here to see me because in war, I was known as a killing machine. 

I refused the impulse to look up at the cliffside; that had been very clear instructions from Izuna to all of us in the final meeting before the battle.

"You are not to look back on the cliffside where your comrades are hiding. Not once. Not even one of you. One look caught by the enemy might give the plan away, and it will all have been for nothing. Equally, the soldiers on the cliffside are not to peak over it until you hear our horn, signalling for you to load your arrows and lift your spears. Am I being clear?"

The enemy war horn sounded again, and I tapped my horse in his sides asking for canter, which he gladly gave. I was in the front, and crashed into the enemy line, lifting my sword, separating limbs from torsos. The smell of blood and spilling guts was like poison, almost made me gag. You never got used to that smell.

But adrenaline kept me going. For several minutes, we battled before the horn on our side sounded. We had now managed to do the castling, having the enemy army trapped between us and the cliff with the cleft in it as Izuna had instructed, giving them free passage into the cleft. 

And arrows and spears started showering on them, hitting chests and thighs and horses' hearts.

As soon as they realised where the arrows and spears were coming from, they headed for the cleft, and...

And when they or their horses, depending on if they were on foot or mounted, stepped on a mine, they stiffened up and slumped to the side. I frowned. They weren't dead, but completely paralysed. Izuna... God, he was clever. 

It was an incredible invention that didn't kill the enemy but just rendered them useless for battle. Only a fraction of the enemy army was paralysed before they understood not to go through the cleft, but it was enough. They realised they couldn't win now they were vastly outnumbered.

"Retreat!!" I heard someone in the enemy army scream. 

And they did. 

Our men cheered. I took off my helmet and smiled. Izuna could take the entire honour for this war. It was entirely his doing, and I couldn't help but feel an immense pride swell in my chest. Suddenly, my stomach clenched with longing and I couldn't wait to get home. I had seen a bush of wild roses on the way here, each flower beautifully complex and deep red, and would pick one for him on my way back to give. 

And in that one second of calm, of having removed my helmet, of having relaxed, I suddenly felt a hard tug in my neck.

It took me eons to figure out I had gotten an arrow straight into my Adam's apple from the side.

I couldn't breathe.

I slumped off my horse, and stayed laying on the ground.