Random People I Remember

The Interview

She asked me her question, short, strong, straight to the point. Her eyes left mine immediately as she looked down at her notes, pen perfectly poised, ready to capture everything I said. I started speaking. As much as I didn't want my nerves to get the better of me, I felt the words of each breath shake as they left my trembling lungs. Focusing intently on her notes, she gave no indication as I was talking that she understood the points I was trying to make. There was no nod, no smile, not even the subtlest indication that I was answering appropriately or effectively.

Slightly taken aback, I turned to the other interviewers, but they too were focusing entirely on their notes. There were awkward pauses, redundancies in my speech patterns, filler words. I tried to remember to articulate myself authentically, but I was at a loss on how I could articulate myself effectively to people who were not even looking me in my eyes.

When I finished speaking, she looked up and asked me another question, short, strong, straight to the point. The process went on like this until suddenly it was abruptly over. Suddenly the ice shattered, and they were genuinely smiling at me as I got up and bowed to acknowledge and thank each person for this opportunity. I really wanted this job, and yet I felt my fierce passion had not been properly conveyed to the cold and focused demeanor presented before me.

I left the building confused and in a daze. Putting my car into reverse, there was nothing left but to hope for the best. I understood that she needed to take as many notes as possible for her coworkers, and in fact, her sheer focus and intent straightforward nature was something I could only hope to achieve one day. I, who was so emotional and focused on other people's feelings and understandings, doubted it though. Some people are just so different you can only manage to see them pass you by like a powerful gale, and as the winds sweep through your hair, you're left a bit breathless, dazed, and in awe. Sometimes, in the mess of life and my endless emotions, I wonder what it would be like if only everything were so straightforward as her.