All This Time

Like a jolt of caffeine

Paul didn't know what to expect after he had left the note for MJ, to be honest. He had no idea if they lived in the building, much less even go back to see their poster again. Sure, he noticed that the letter was gone when he returned from work that night, but anyone else who lived or worked there could've picked that up.

So it was an utter surprise when he noticed a new note pinned on the board beside the poster, addressed to him. Well, to "C," because all the studying about data privacy laws at work had made him automatically wary with leaving sensitive information anywhere public.

But there it was, for him.

Hi, C!

Wow. Thank you for your kind note! I really thought that I was about to get a poster-eviction notice from the building admin for illegally posting something on the board, so your message was a delightful (and welcome!) surprise. Thank you for taking the time to write this. I'm glad that it made an impact on you.

Unfortunately, this isn't for sale—only because I haven't gotten to that stage yet. But if you really want this, you can have it! Since I don't know who you are, I'm leaving this note on the board, too, so when you see it, feel free to take the poster with you. No one really looks at the board anyway (except for us), so I figure this should get to you safely. And I don't think anyone would notice the poster's absence when you get it. So go, just get it—it's all yours. :)

And really, thank you so much. You're the first one who has paid attention to what a little amateur artist girl like me has made, and you don't know how much this means to me.

Cheers,

MJ

After reading the letter—twice!—Paul reached out to get the poster from the board that was now his. Then he stopped, turned, and went to the reception desk instead.

"Kuya Efren, do you have paper?" Paul asked.

"For what?" The usually cheerful morning shift guard's expression turned suspicious. "Didn't you ask for paper yesterday, too?"

He remembered that? "I just need to write something quickly. Please, Kuya? Promise last na."

Kuya Efren's frown told Paul that he didn't believe him, but he gave him a piece of paper anyway. He wrote his reply and pinned it on the board, drawing an arrow to point to the poster again, like he did yesterday. And just like yesterday, he found that he had an extra spring in his step after leaving the note, except that his excitement level might be higher today because of MJ's reply.

Funny how much this short note had made him so happy today, when the other day he didn't even know she existed, didn't even pay attention to the poster on the board. But maybe he was just looking for something new, something to make his day more interesting.

Paul had always been a creature of habit. He thrived in routines because they made his life less complicated, giving him more time and headspace for more important things, like his pages and pages of readings when he was still in law school. However, when he passed the bar exams, the freed-up headspace made room for all the existential questions in life that Paul figured people his age often asked. Questions like, what was he supposed to do in his life? What was his purpose? Was there something bigger that he was meant to do? How can he find it? What if he can't find it?

At first, he thought the questions were there because of his last break-up, and it would probably go away once he finally truly moved on from his ex. But then he moved on from her, and the questions still lingered, sometimes even more insistent than it was before.