Aria's Story

~ Chapter 11 ~

I'm not okay. Hunter hasn't spoken to me in almost two weeks and I'm starting to get really anxious about it. I see him in the hallways at school, he looks at me, but doesn't come near me, or talk to me in that case. I think it's safe to say that I ruined the best relationship I have ever been and it's completely all my fault. I tried calling and texting him so many times, but he didn't answer any of them. Instead of talking to him about it, I just ignored it and hated myself even more for it. Nobody, not even my sister, has spoken to me in almost a full week and a half. It's like nobody cares about me anymore and I'm just not good enough for anyone.

I grab my phone and jacket, and head downstairs and then outside. It's a Sunday and it's pretty warm outside, which I like and enjoy. I start walking towards my right and don't stop until I'm satisfied at where I'm at or decide on going somewhere else. Before I realize what I was doing, I pull open the door to the bowling alley a few blocks away from my house. I look around and spot the counter, which is towards my right and as I walk closer, I see people bowling with their families and some bowling with their friends. I smile at them when I notice that they saw me look over at them. I walk up to the counter and ask for a lane so that I could bowl a few games. After I was giving a lane and after I paid for it, I walk over to the lane.

I grab a bright blue ball and start walking up near the lane where he bowl at. I walk up, the ball in hand, and roll it down the lane. It curves a little but surprisingly spins towards the center of the lane, leaving only two pins up. As I go for the remaining pins, I think of a song that I really like so that I could focus on getting the pins to knock down, and I roll the ball down the lane again. It looks like it's about to go in the gutter ball but suddenly curves to the pins and knocks both of the pins down. I cheer and smile for myself. I can actually play a sport and be good at it. 

I ended up playing three games. The games I played scored between 150-190 each time and went up higher each time. As I leave the bowling alley in a good mood, I walk towards the grocery store and walk in. It didn't take long to get here because it was only across the street from the bowling alley. I look around, and start getting the stuff that we need at my house, and then I went up to the counter and paid for them. 

When I was walking back towards my neighborhood, I spot the State Fair. Hunter and I went there not even a month ago. We were having so much fun and we were so happy then. We met a woman not even in her thirties and her beautiful baby girl who was just born recently. I got to hold that baby and I had the best time talking to her and talking to her mom, and spending time with them was just amazing and it made my day even brighter. Now, though, I'm left alone with nothing to do and nobody to hang out with.

I walk back home, feeling absolutely miserable and lonely. I know I deserve this but I don't feel so good being alone with no one to talk to or be near. I walk up the stairs and then I walk into my room, and go right to my bed, where I just fall back onto. I look around my room, looking for something to distract me from the feelings that I was feeling. I saw a picture of Hunter and I laying on the ground in the corner of my room and I walk over to it and pick it up. I examine it as I feel a tear slip down my face. We were at his cousin's farm house and we were feeding one of their horses, and I remember that day so clearly. We got to ride one of the horses together and at the end of the ride, before we got off, he leaned in closer to me and kissed me with so much passion that I couldn't help but love him.

I fall down to my knees, sobbing. It feels so real and so deathly to be in such a situation like this. Not knowing what's going to happen, today or even two weeks from now. I survive through the day every single day and I hope for a happy ending, I hope for this moment in my life to end so that I can finally be happy again. But it doesn't work that way, I have to keep on being this way until I have what it takes to get better and to be a better person for myself and for other people.