Aria's Story

~ Chapter 17 ~

**Flashback**

It's been almost a week since we found out Reagan didn't make it. Today's the day of her funeral and I don't even want to leave my room. Chris is taken it more calmly than me. He got three weeks off of school and work because of what happened and all he's been doing is laying around the house, trying to organize everything perfectly. Unlike him, I'm doing much, much more worse. I have barely left my room since we got back and I have rarely got off of my bed. Hunter comes over a few times every day to make sure we are doing okay. He tries his best to get me to eat and to help Chris calm down when he's crying but let's face it, it's not going to help. Both of us are a mess. He is too, though, so he can bear with us.

From the moment I found out about her, I have kinda been distant from everyone and I've found myself crying when I didn't even know I was. I was hurt, pained even. The thought of her not here anymore, the thought of her gone is just too overwhelming for me. I just wish I could see her one last time and tell her that I love her and give her a huge hug, and tell her that everything was going to be okay. The last thing I said to her was that I didn't ruin her life but she ruined mine and that I hated her for leaving me. None of it was true and I hate myself even more for allowing myself to say that to her. Now, she's gone and I'm left with nothing but regret, lots of regret.

I grab my purse as I walk over to the mirror in my room and look at myself through it, scanning my dress and makeup, making sure it looks decent enough to go out in public with. I walk out of my room and silently walk towards the stairs. I stare at the stairs, not really wanting to go down there and face everyone, let alone go to the funeral. I walk down the stairs and walk around, trying to find Hunter or Chris. I fake a smile to people who wave at me and give me sad looks. I spot Hunter talking to Nicole by the back door, and as I walk to them, they look at me and pull me into a tight hug, whispering to me that they're there for me.

The funeral wasn't for two more hours so Chris decided to invite family and friends over and hang out so we could all go together. I knew when I woke up this morning that this was going to be one of the hardest days of my life. I was going have to speak in front of everyone there and talk about my sister, and I was so scared to even do that. I haven't spoken to anyone in almost a week and I think I'm falling back into my old habits. I don't want to be around anyone right now, and I definitely don't want to be at the funeral later.

Chris sees me and walks over to me, giving me a tight hug and tells that everything is going to be okay and that he's not going anywhere, at least not any time soon. I smile at him and squeeze as he hugs me again before walking off. I watch him as he walks up up to one his friends and gives her a hug. Chris has a lot of friends and he's quite popular at Yale. He can make friends in an instant and I think that's really good for him. It can be sometimes annoying, though.

I look back over to Hunter and Nicole and notice that they're staring right at me, "How are you?" Hunter asks me, looking at me with a concern look on his face. I shrug, not wanting to say anything. He looks over at Nicole with a sad expression and she just shrugs it off like it was nothing, like I was nothing to her. At this point in life, I don't know who to believe and who not to believe when it comes to caring about me.

When we all get to the funeral, we go our separate ways and walk to the people who we love and care about to spend this memorable moment with. Hunter, Nicole, and I walk towards the seats in the very front. We sit down, not speaking. Hunter reaches down next to me and holds my hand. He looks at me and smiles one of the most sweetest and saddest smiles I've ever seen him do.

People start sitting down on the seats around us, and the funeral finally begins. The speaker walks to the center of the front of the room and starts talking, "We are all gathered here today because of the loss of Reagan Ann McAndrew," He speaks with so much courage and as he continues to talk, I can feel tears slip down my face. Hunter looks at me and lets me rest my head on his shoulder and holds my hand as I cry. "We have arranged for the immediate family to speak here today. Would we please remain silent until they finish? First up to speak is the mother of Reagan, Mrs. Sierra McAndrew."