Suga Oneshots and Sickfics

Hiding

Requested by Banabamilk

warning: eating disorders, unspecified self-harm, depression

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Nobody knew. Yoongi was pretty good at hiding everything.

He was good at so many things, except one thing.

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Fuck. Yoongi groaned.

He collapsed onto the floor next to his bed, breathing hard. His heart was beating way too quickly. Maybe not eating today and working out for two hours wasn't a good idea.

He lay on the ground for a while. The air rushed past his ears, making him feel light-headed. Yoongi gulped in as much as he could.

But he was so hungry. He longed to go to the pantry and chow down all the chips Jungkook had gotten.

No, no, no, he did not want to do that. That was a lie. That would destroy his progress. That would break his fast.

All of a sudden, there were rushed footsteps to his door. His heart thudded.

"My guy, Yoongi, what are you doing in there?" Jin asked from outside.

"I was cleaning my room!" Yoongi called back.

"Oh... okay then!"

Yoongi tried to slow his breathing. The others would never find out. Jin's footsteps faded away. He was leaving. Yoongi was safe.

The room spun when he got to his feet. Yoongi gritted his teeth. This was just a small side-effect. When he could finally be proud of himself, everything would be fine.

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He let himself go.

Yoongi couldn't sleep at night. He was so hungry and desperate for food. Jungkook had gotten those big bags of chips. It wouldn't hurt if he had a few. A few wouldn't hurt anybody.

He carefully slid out of the bed. Yoongi nearly crumpled onto the floor. He was so tired. The floor felt freezing to his feet.

Heading out of his room, he went towards the pantry. Everyone else was asleep, nobody would see him stealing the chips.

The chips were on the second shelf. Yoongi opened the shelf door, and took them out. The chips were the big family size packs, meaning that there was lots of stuff inside.

At first, Yoongi wanted to only have handful of chips. Just enough to satisfy his appetite and let him go back to sleep. But that didn't happen. Once he started eating, he couldn't stop. He hadn't eaten properly in weeks and that was finally coming back to bite his ass.

He finished the first bag of chips, then the second, then the third. He ate it all in less than an hour. Yoongi couldn't stop himself. In those moments, he didn't care. He needed something.

When the guilt finally started to set in, it was too late. The calories had already been consumed and everything had been ruined.

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"I swear, I bought a whack load of chips the other day. Where did they go?" Jungkook asked.

"What? They're gone?" Jin asked.

"Yeah! All three of them too!"

"Whoa... whoever ate all that must have had a real appetite," Taehyung said.

Yoongi kept a blank look frozen on his face. To punish himself after eating, he hadn't had lunch or dinner for three days afterward. Surely, that was enough punishment. Hopefully Jungkook wouldn't yell.