*Okay yes meek took the girl back to his house. I said hotel but I did change it so there ain't no confusion😂 But.. Enjoy😘*
Nicki
(Sweden)
"Nic-" Sherika busted into my room once again and I didnt look up. Instead, I looked at my phone screen.
It was stuck on a selfie that me and Meek took together. I wasnt going to lie and say I didnt miss him.
I just didn't want to go through the heartbreak. He did it once, he'll do it again.
The trust is gone. I dont know if it will ever come back but I do know the feelings wont be going anywhere anytime soon.
No matter how much I try to stay mad... I cant.
No thats doesn't mean I'm going to run into his arms like shit is okay. He hurt me. The last thing I needed was another reason to cry.
I swear I've cried so much I dont think I have any tears left. I didn't think he would ever be that person.
You know, the person to make me feel so much love and so much hurt at the same time.
But I love him. I'm attracted to that bad side of him. When I'm around he acts totally different.
That 'Idgaf' attitude leaves and he becomes the sweetest guy.
Now it's like He doesnt care if I see that side or not. It's not that though. That 'Idgaf' has become a regular with me. That's what I'm not attracted to.
I try to be easy to supportive, loving... A good girl to him.
I've spent those years being a perfect woman for a man who didn't appreciate. Then Meek came along. He acted as if he could handle me.
He told me, "He didnt appreciate you... but I do. You're perfect."
I believed him. Now it all backfired and once again Im looking like the stupid, naive girl who continuously looks dumb and used.
I dont want to be that girl.
"Nicki," Sherika touched me softly and I looked up.
I didnt realize I was crying until I felt the tear run down my cheek.
Sherika wiped it away. "I'm tired of seeing you crying. I know your hurting but you're stronger than this."
I knew I was stronger than this. But it hurt and it wasn't easy to get over things like this. Not anytime soon anyway.
"The team is downstairs waiting for us. We have to go."
I forgot I had a show tonight. I was so caught up in my feelings and thoughts to notice.
I grabbed a tissue and wiped my face.
I had soundcheck before the concert tonight. It was my first time performing for my own tour in a while.
"You ready?" Sherika asked me and I nodded.
I grabbed my purse and phone.
I didnt want the team to think it was something up. I wanted shit to go smooth tonight.
I grabbed my coat, threw my hood over my head and plugged in my ear phones.
Tamar Braxton's - Pieces happened to be playing.
I deserve more than just a little part I don't want nothing, if I can't have it all I ain't even gonna play with something I can't keep I want the whole thing or forget about me
The fact that this song fit my mood at the moment. I quickly put the song on repeat as it ended.
Meek
(Philly)
