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by ambby94

by ambby94

I just can't believe what he'd done to me,
like everything we shared meant nothing for him.
I feel empty, and i think about him every day,
I haven't been outside for days, but i still have to face him
in school.
It's gonna be hard, i'm going back to school tomorrow and i have
to pretend like nothing happened.

I knew it wouldn't be the same, that i was excited to see him every day, now would be a big bother to me.
" How are you feeling darling? " mom asked, as she entered my room. " I'm not feeling too good... but it's just a couple more months left, so i can't miss any more days. " i said.
" What are you studying? " mom sat down on my bed. " I'm studying Biology. " i said. " I have an important exam next week and i can't fail. "
Ofcourse all i could think about were the last words Atsuto told me, that he wanted to make things work with his wife.
" Alright well, you're doing a great job, i'll bring you cheesecake and some milk later. " mom said, and pressed a kiss on my forehead, then she left the room.
I could barely concentrate on my studies, the words echoed through my head somewhat i thought he never even really liked me.

"Hey, you look messed up." Isabel said, when i arrived at school. Spring break was over, but i wasn't able to enjoy it at all.
" Yeah, i haven't slept all night. " i said. " I was supposed to start my period two days ago, and it still hasn't happened. " I said.
" Do you have stress maybe? could you be pregnant? " My eyes whidened as she said that, pregnancy hadn't crossed my mind yet, but it was a possability.
" Oh my god, you're not pregnant are you? " Isabel stopped me from walking, and looked into my eyes. " Is it.... his? "
" It's probably nothing. " i quickly said. " oh come on, what if your parents find out? what are you going to tell them? they have to know who the father is. "
" That's not gonna happen, i will buy a pregnancy test after school just to make sure. " i said.
" A baby is going to ruin your future. " " I know, i know. " i said as we stepped into class. " I don't know what i'm going to to with a baby, i'm too young and unemployed. "
Atsuto heared us talking about a baby, so he turned around. " What is this about? " he looked into my eyes, but i just wasn't ready to talk to him.
" Isabel, can you tell mister Uchida that it's none of his business? " i said, looking at my dear friend. " We need a talk right after class. " Atsuto said, while touching my arm. I pushed his arm away. " Stay away from me. " i mumbled, and sat down on my spot.
I couldn't believe i could be pregnant, i was already scared to think about doing the test, and honestly, that's all i thought about during class.

" Can we talk ? " Atsuto asked me after class, when i was about to leave. " i think we're done talking, can i go now? " i tried to push myself away from him, but i couldn't.
" What was that talk about a baby? you are not pregnant are you ? " he stared at my stomach.
" I don't know, i was about to buy a test, but then you stopped me from going. "
" I can go with you, if you want to. " i shook my head. " You and i don't have a future together, so if i am indeed pregnant, i'm not gonna keep it. "
Atsuto took a deep breath. " That's good..... i really want to have children, but with the right woman. "
he made it sound like i wasn't right for him at all, i looked up at him, looked him right in his eyes, tears burning in the corners of my eyes.
" Amber.... i'm ... i'm sorry i didn't mean to.... " he slowly touched my arm to try to comfort me.
" DON'T! " i screamed, and slapped his arm away from my skin. " Every second i spend in this school seeing you, i die a little more, and look at you being all happy with your wife whom you cheated on " i said. " You must be very proud of yourself. "
I shook my head. " Forget about it " then i walked away, he wasn't even trying to stop me from leaving, and it hurted. Like he was meant to say that he was glad he was finally done with me.