Mama Eda AU

What if

Notes:

How episode one was originally supposed to be written
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text
A grey haired witch who is wearing a bandana on her head is known as , Eda sorts through the trash delivered by Owlbert and snowy.
Let's see. Garbage...garbage...garbage...Oh, now this! (Puts on joke glasses) These will make me rich! What do you think, Hon? Do you like Momma's new look?

A witch hybrid wearing a brown hooded robe is named, Oswald walks over to put an arm around Eda.
"Very much so. But maybe don't ditch the golden goblet? We could probably sell it for some snails."

Not really. It's fake gold. Something you spot from years of practice.

Doesn't mean we still can't sell it someone who wouldn't know the difference.

Eda grins, pecking Oswald on the lips. I knew I married you for a reason. (Goes to pull out the Azura book) As for this...Well, a little kindling for the fire won't hurt.

Eda puts the book over the fire, but Luz runs out and snatches it before running away.

Luz gasps. Sorry, that's mine!

...Was that a human...just like me? Oswald asked.

Looks like it. Eda pulls out the portal key and closes the portal before Luz could run through. You're not going anywhere!

Luz screams, running out from under the tent.

Oswald adds. I think you scared them.

Eda laughs. Fear's good. Helps ya grow.

Oswald sighs. Mm-hm. I'm going to go make sure they don't get hurt.

Oh, boo.

They could have a family, Eda.

...Less boo.

________

Luz panics hiding behind a trash can. Did I die?! Am I in the bad place...

Oswald sneaks up, taps Luz on the shoulder, jolting the human girl.

Gah! Please don't eat me.

Woah! It's ok. I'm not going to hurt you.

Luz still seems cautious.

My Name is Oswald Clawthorne. What's yours?

....Luz. Luz Noceda.

Well, Luz, if you come with me, then I'm sure we can sort things out. He offers a hand, but Luz only stares at it.....Or, you could just stay here and wait to get eaten by the next fairy. Your choice.

Luz noticing fairies flying nearby. I choose you!
Luz takes Oswald's hand and they lead her back to Eda's tent.

____________

Oswald sits Luz down on a stool in front of the stand.

Luz frowns. Look, I just wanted to get my book back. Sorry for interrupting...whatever is going on here.

Eda laughs. Oh, I'll tell you what's going on here. You...are a paying customer!

Luz: Huh?

Eda picking up random stuff. Can I get you a human foot filled with holes? Or some human candy?