Changed For Keeps

IV: After Five Years

Everything is temporary. I think that statement is half true yet half false. I believe that authors and screenwriters simply produced an ideal fiction that allows readers and audience to believe on something that is falsely true. I mean, who doesn't want a good happy ending? That's what people want to see, right?

It's been four months since the first day. Less than a month since he and I had spoken for the first time in five years. Five years. I still can't believe it. It feels like a total dreamㅡan impossible reality. It was completely awkward, yes, but all the same it was pleasant however nerve wracking and weird. We were so used to having each other by our sides and as well as ignoring each other's company for years. I haven't told the girls about this abrupt situation yet, because I think they'll be asking way too many questions and I don't know if I can handle that.

During our short encounter, there were a few things that I couldn't help but notice. A few things such as change. Mentally, I've listed in my head some changes in him. When you meet someone for the first time in a long time, you can't help but notice these particular changes that has been made.

List of Changes:
•His voice has gotten deep. Compared to when he was still in middle school and I was in the sixth grade, his voice was normal and made a little bit high-pitched so I was surprised when he started speaking. I mean, I had heard his deep voice before but it was indistinct; vague. When he spoke clearly with only a close distance between us, the words came out deeper than I had expected. I'm so used to hearing his semi-high pitched voice that it almost seemed uncomfortable to hear his 'new' voice now.

•When I was eight and he was nine, I was close to his height. The top of my head was at his eye level. It had been that way until after we stopped communicating. He wasn't tall and lanky. That's Kwangsoo, and he has always been towering over me like the giant he is. With Joongki-oppa, I'm only above his shoulder now. The difference in our height makes my stomach churn every time I think about it. I can't help but think that I wasn't thereㅡand I wanted to be thereㅡwhen his height and everything else about his physical features started to change. I wanted to tease him for his never-ending voice cracks. I wanted to see him brag about his new height and how he is no longer short. But then I can only imagine them in my head and pretend that they all happen in they way I could.

•He gained a few muscles here and there. In the arms (most definitely) and everywhere else. Now that, was easy to spot. He's not the same scrawny kid he once was. That day a few weeks ago, he wasn't wearing a blazer. He simply had a wrinkled white long-sleeved polo. Around his collar, a red tie hanged and he was a little disheveled and he looked haggard. However, he makes disheveled and haggard look... cool. He can work a tired look effortlessly and look cool and handsome. He doesn't even have to try. He is one of those boys who looks innate with it. I'm guessing playing soccer made the change for him.

•His dark brown hair was the first thing I noticed right away that day. It's not that long anymore but it's still effortlessly messy. A little. Which is nice. It suits him. He used to keep and like the shaggy hair of his that almost covered his whole face. I could tell he was bothered or rather annoyed by it. He kept flipping his hair to keep his bangs away from his eyes. It was funny. He was keeping the loathe of the length of his hair lowkey because he knows that I would point it out. He loved his shaggy hair that much that after his mom, Aunt Song, takes him to a barber shop, he would find ways to make his hair grow longer, fast.

"I'm just going to the bakery nearby! I'll be back soon!" I call out before I leave my household. I hear my voice echo around the room and I'm not so surprised. The house is practically empty. There's only me, Mr. Ji, and six of the maids.