You're my safe haven

CHAPTER 4️⃣

*NIGHTMARE*
I walked into my apartment after a long shift at the diner. I was too tired to eat, so I just hopped in the shower. I heard a noise that sounded like something fell "what the hell," I thought to myself; once I was all clean, I even felt even more tired with a hot shower relaxing my sore body. I got dressed. I was about to close the door to my bedroom. I saw a tall figure staring straight back at me. No, this can't be happening. How did he get out?
With a deep sinister voice, " Honey, I'm home. Did you miss me!?!" then the next thing I knew, he forced his way into my room, grabbed me by the throat, and threw me on the bed, " I told you before I will always find your mine and mine alone you think you can leave me? Think again, sweetheart."  next thing I saw that he was holding a knife, and with his last words, "as I told you that night, if I can't have you, no one can," he stabbed me right throw the heart as I was trying to catch my last breath the last I saw before I closed my eyes was that sinister hateful smile he would give me when he was torturing me
*END OF NIGHTMARE*

I jolted out of bed, trying to catch my breath. My body was covered in sweat as I tried to control my breathing. I kept repeating to myself, "You're safe. It was just a nightmare. Jackson can't hurt you anymore." I look at the time. It was five in the morning. I knew I wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep, so I made my way to the kitchen to make myself some breakfast. Once I was done with my food, I cleaned up the mess I made, putting all the dishes away. I took a shower to get ready for work. Today is Friday, so I work the morning shift at the diner, and then after work, I have group therapy.

Later on that day, work was going by pretty fast. By the time I was done with my last table, I was so ready to clock out. I went to grab my jacket and purse from behind the register. I heard the door chime open. I didn't even bother looking up. I told the person that they could find a seat and someone would be with them immediately after I heard the person clear their throat and saying, " I would just like two coffees to go, please." the voice sounded familiar. When I looked up, I couldn't help but smile once I confirmed who it was.
Celina- Chris! Nice to see you again
Chris - Hey Celina! Same here. I'm sorry, did I catch you at the wrong time? 
Celina-  Oh yeah, I mean no, I just finished my shift. I was just on my way out, but ill grab your order before I leave
Chris- No, it's okay. I don't want to hold you up. I can wait for someone else. I don't want to trouble you-
Celina- It's no trouble, Chris. I have a couple of minutes before I leave. It's not a problem
Chris- Thank you, so what are you up to after work then?
Celina- I have a group today, so that is where I will be
I said with a slight smile on my face as I poured the fresh cups of coffee. He hummed in response
Celina-  That would be $2.50
Chris - Here you go! Can I walk you out then?

I just nodded as we headed to the door. I waved goodbye to my coworkers and told them ill see them Monday. I walked out with Chris right behind me. I saw his partner. I smiled and gave him a wave as he gave me the gesture in return; I turned to Chris and said
Celina- So I guess I'll see you around then? Since you know where I work now, I can even give you a free slice of the pie of your choosing, of course!
Chris laughed at what I said. I would love to hear that laugh all the time.

Chris- I will keep that in mind for the next time I stop by.

We said our goodbyes; he even offered to drive me to the church where the meeting was. I politely declined his offer " No, it's okay, I don't mind the walk, " I said with a smile. I didn't want to bother them for a ride, and I like clearing my head beforehand. He just nodded with an understanding smile as I turned to walk away. I don't know, and I couldn't fight with to ride. I had to get one more look when I turned back; I saw him getting in his police car. He looked at me and gave me another smile and a small wave. I couldn't help as I started to feel the butterfly's in my stomach.

Twenty minutes later, I was able to make it to the church just in time. As I saw the girls started to walk in, we began to talk about our stories and what had happened in the past week. It was my turn to speak.

I haven't had a nightmare in the month, but last night. My worst fear came true, at least in the dream. He found me I don't know-how, and he finished what he started two years ago. He said he would kill me for trying to leave, and in the dream, he did just that. When I woke up, I knew I was safe. I knew that he couldn't hurt me, but I always thought in the back of my mind, what if one day he finishes what he said he was going to do? I know there's no chance of him getting out, but I feel like I really won't be free until he is dead and that I know he is gone for good. I feel like my life is going well. I guess I am just waiting for the other shoe to drop when everything is going so well something consistently goes wrong. I know a part of me died that night, and someone else came out of that house. It scares me; I don't know if it's good or bad, but I also don't want to find out. What if I don't like the person I've become? What if I never get back on good terms with my family or my best friend? I miss them so much, but I haven't spoken to them in four years. I don't get why I'm still scared to talk to them. I think they might hate me for not telling them I don't want their pity either I don't want people feeling sorry for me; I mean, it's sad what happened, but I survived, right? I believe I'm stronger for it.
Right? I thought to myself, I'm a stronger person? Who survived the worst night of her life?  There has to be a reason I survived that night. I don't know for what, at least not yet.