Chaos Was A Girl || MGK

0.2 - coming clean

June 3, 2018 - 1:30 pm

"Are you motherfuckers ready to rock?!" I shout as I run out on stage, immediately noticing Colson, Rook, Taylor, Alex, Kellin, and Andy in the back which makes me smile as I flip them off. "As some of you may know, I released a single last week, like a few days before warped began." I grin when the crowd begins to cheer. "If you know it please sing along. This is Gimme A Minute!"

...Just gimme a minute, gimme a minute
Thought I got through it, maybe I didn't, uh
Thought it was over, maybe it isn't
Just gimme a minute, gimme a minute...

"Alright so, we're about to get really, really fucking emotional here." I say, taking a deep breath as Rook stares at me wide eyed when I come back out in a long black robe, realising what I was doing. "There's some things no one knows about me except for a few people. Very few. Until now that is. Everyone knows that I grew up in the foster system but I haven't told you who got me out of it. A-and he didn't tell anyone because I asked him not to, I didn't want to gain my fame by association, I wanted to gain it through my music and my own voice. T-this man-" I pause as a lump forms in my throat and causes my voice to get higher. My eyes begin to water as I take a deep breath and I search for my friends, keeping my eyes on them and finding comfort in their presence. "This man, I'd have probably have killed myself years ago if it weren't for him." I say honestly, seeing as everyone's faces form a look of shock except for Rook and Kellin. "A-and when I lost h-him, I tried to." I pause for a second to wipe my eyes and take a sip of water before revealing one of my biggest secrets. "My adoptive father was Chester Bennington." I confess as their jaws drop in shock. "A-and I've, I've made a promise to myself to perform a Linkin Park song at every single show I play for the rest of my fucking life. I didn't perform one at the last show because I just wasn't emotionally ready- I was scared. Bu-but in the revelation of who my father was, I want t-to explain j-just how fucking much he did for me. I had been in the foster system basically since birth. And out of the sixteen years I spent in the system, I spent twelve of those being abused." I continue as gasps are heard throughout the crowd, Taylor holding her hand up to her mouth as she begins to cry when I stand up and take the robe off. Once I let it fall to the floor I'm left in a pair of black jean shorts and a blood red sports bra, no makeup on to hide my tattoos or my scars this time. "The day Chester adopted me was the day I planned to kill myself. I was sixteen years old when he adopted me and I was fortunate enough to have him as my father for five years. And thanks to the media, most people know that I attempted to kill myself the day after he had passed this past July. I hadn't felt pain before I lost him, everything I had felt couldn't compare to what I felt when I found out he was gone. I got this butterfly tattoo for him, because he would always compare me to one. Always telling me that my life is precious, as fragile as the wings of a butterfly and that I should cherish it with all that I have because I'll never know when my wings will be clipped." I explain as I point to the butterfly on my stomach before continuing. "So, before I run out of time, this is One More Light." I announce as I sit down at the piano, beginning to cry harder at the sound of the intro when I start playing it. I force myself to get it together before beginning to sing.

...Who cares if one more light goes out? Well I do...

"San Francisco it has been a fucking pleasure. With the end of the show I would like to say my peace. Cherish your loved ones. With everything you've fucking got. Because it fucking sucks when you lose them and I regret it every day that I didn't spend more time with Chester than I did. I love you all, you've been an amazing crowd. Now please give it up for Of Mice and Men." I force a smile as I slip my robe back on before kissing my knuckles and holding up devil horns as I walk off the stage, immediately being pulled into a hug and I instantly begin crying again as Kellin whispers comforting words in my ears. A few minutes later I pull away and wipe my eyes when I hear footsteps approaching us. I look up to see Andy, Rook, Colson, and Taylor walking in our direction. When Rook and Taylor meet my eyes they both run over and pull me into a tight hug.