LUST C.H|| book 1

Grief/ hate

Chapter 2

My eyes opened slowly I look around as my surroundings were different not at the right place I should be at. Seeing a most likely posters and guitars a guy can own from being in a band, my head clicked making my eyes widened. Was I in Calum's place?, this has got to be a fever dream. The sound of water turns off from the shower as the door opens, you have got to be shiting me it's him! He looks up and smiles warmly, he reaches to his drawer for his clothes of a black tee and grabs skinny jeans he turns around at me and narrows his eyes, "can you turn around please", I laughed the thought of a guy being embarrassed to change I'm front of a girl which was normal all though he looked shy. I don't even know what happened but asking him if he knew it would make me feel scared.
"Can I ask what happened last night? All I remember was being blacked out before I stopped the fight you had with that guy", I say. "Oh last night was something but you remember Mitchell the dude who yelled at you instead of him being my plus one", he said. My brain clicks and now felt uncomfortable inside what was his issue?, "you can turn now, but yeah he went crazy so I stopped him before he did anything illegal if you ask me what it was I don't even know myself", he explains in a awful tone coming off weird. "What I want to know is you saved me so that nothing happens to me or it was whatever?", I asked. He looked at me taking a seat from the edge of his bed, "honestly I did it because I care not in a sexual or weird way but something about you reminds me of someone I once knew", he says looking down. truly I wanted to ask what was wrong he's done nothing wrong but care to ask what it was. "What's wrong?", "sorry I don't know why I started to get sad I... I just been through a lot dealing with grief", "I'm so sorry do you want to talk about it?", what no that's stupid of me to say.
"Well it would be really nice I don't normally tell anyone my personal life but I lost someone special my girlfriend to a car accident", he tells me, my mouth drops slapping my hand to my lips. "I'm so sorry to hear that", my voice sounded teary. "It's okay it's been two years I haven't got my self together dealing with it I wasn't ready to move on yet from that tragedy", Calum said. "No I understand it's hard losing your love one I personally don't know what it's like to witness something happen to your love ones", Calum nods having a small smile. Deep down I know what it's like to lose someone other then my dad. Did that also mean I remind him some parts from his girlfriends personality?

"I hate to ruin the moment but we got to get going do you want a ride back to your house?", he asks kindly. "Honestly I don't ever want to go back it's filled with nothing but lecturing lessons of shame", "what's that supposed to mean?", he asks confused. "It means being framed for very little things worth nothing of feeling your not living your real life like a normal teen", I try not to cry holding them back but thinking about it makes it more difficult to think how my life could be more traumatic. He gets closer looking at me concerned, "are you really okay?", he asked with his voice getting deep. "Not really I'm tired of my mom always shaming me making me look bad why do you think I looked bad last night", "you didn't you looked amazing last night you really know how to style yourself at a young age which you're how old?", he paused himself. I didn't want to make it that awkward meaning he might be much older then me telling by his height. "I don't want to make thing less awkward I'd rather not say", my face feels red if embarrassment. "Why not it's not like you have anything to hide from me", he chuckles. He was right but I had nothing to hide as long as he didn't questioned my whole "discography life". I was not planning to tell my age until I get to know him better the terms of this stage level of talking is going real fast what the hell do I do lie? He's very attractive but doesn't mean I like him in that way or do I? I don't know it's confusing. Am I living in some book where I get to be with him? Fuck no like if I'm enough to be worth his time to be around with this is some clowning moment here. I hate to be that one
Person who fantasizes about every hot guys I see hoping a zero chance to be with would play me but in this case it's the time to be thinking about how else would I do or say spray it don't say it?