Odds Are We're Gonna Be Alright

Didn't You Get The Memo?

(Listen to this chapter here! https://soundcloud.com/ficcable/chapter-6-odds-are-were-gonna-be-alright)

Matt wanted to have sex with Ryan. Like actual sex. Like "fuck me in the ass" sex.

But as much as he wanted it, he was nervous, or rather, terrified of the idea. Matt himself had never put anything inside uh, there , though he joked about it often. And it was somehow supposed to stretch far enough to accommodate more than a finger or two? How?

Searching through wiki-how articles and forums on his phone, Matt sat up in his bed, his mind frantic. Sure, he had only woken up 15 minutes ago, but his calm, morning wake up was overshadowed with creeping sexual thoughts. He continued to google, searching for advice or maybe even a step by step diagram of how gay sex was supposed to work. Like he knew the general idea, obviously, but at what point does the assumed pain turn to pleasure? Oblivious to how worked up his owner was, Banana laid on top of Matt's legs, curled up and snoring.

"Why are most of these searches just linking to porn?" Matt whined, frustrated. Not that he hadn't tried watching that for tips, but it was too difficult to distinguish who was acting vs actually enjoying themselves. Continuing his search, he looked for questions from other anal-virgins. He saw the same pattern in every answer; prep, lube, stretch, pleasure. But no real answer on how to do any of those steps, just "practice." Was the whole internet playing a joke on Matt? It was literally implying he needed to go fuck himself.

Matt climbed all the way out of bed and stretched his long limbs. Banana, upset from being awoken, meowed loudly and jumped onto a nearby dresser. Still wearing his clothes from the day before, Matt quickly changed into a new, plain-colored t-shirt and jeans, ready to go into work. Harrison caught him before he walked out the front door.

"Carpool?" he said, grinning widely at Matt.

Matt frowned, "Why didn't you go to the office when Jackson did?"

"Because that loser wanted to go in at like 9am," Harry sighed, rolling his eyes more dramatically than the situation called for. "Please, can I go with you?"

Matt shrugged a shoulder, but nodded, and Harry happily bounded behind him. The two slid into the front seats of Matt's car.

"Can I use your phone to put on some music?" Harry asked, knowing Matt's phone was connected via bluetooth.

"Sure, go ahead," agreed Matt, without thinking. He turned the keys in the ignition and started them on their "morning" commute. The engine roared with life as the car merged its way into the suburban traffic.

Unlocking the phone, Harrison took one look at the open applications and whistled. "'Gay sex first time advice?'" Harry read off the search bar.

Matt panicked. Shit , he thought he had cleared all that stuff. But he could play this off; Ryan had played it off.

"You got something you wanna tell me, Matty?" Harry asked slyly, a slight smile dancing on his lips.

"I-I pranked ya! Ha ha, gotcha!" Matt joked. But Harrison didn't laugh. "It's not-I'm not really-it's just a goof. It's for, it's for a sketch. For Supermega."

Harry raised an eyebrow, "I don't know, you're getting awfully flustered over there."

Matt could feel his palms slipping from the steering wheel, coated in sweat.

Harry laughed, "It's okay man, you don't have to tell me." He patted Matt's knee to reassure him, but Matt frowned. Opening the Spotify app, Harrison started to scroll through different playlists.