Never | (Harry Styles AU) • COMPLETE

thirty five.

They say that the things that impact us the most are the things that happen in the blink of an eye, without warning.
Hearing those words-I LOVE YOU..it was indescribable. It happened so fast, but I know it wasn't just some crush, what Bianca and I had grew into a friendship. All that time we spent together..it was dangerous.

And I knew it.

From the very beginning, after seeing her in such a fragile state, I just knew it wasn't going to stay innocent. Being around someone, getting to see who they really are, that changes you. Things could have turned in the opposite direction..I could have ended up despising her, especially when she'd lock me out and refuse to let me in. But I didn't. I'd sit there for as long as it took until she was ready because that's what my heart said to.

"Don't just repeat it because you think you have to," I tell Bianca, my heart, pumping rapidly.

"I'm not," She adjusts her naked body closer to mine.

"Really?" I really just can't believe it. I said I loved her without any expectation of hearing it back..after all how could she love a man like me? Those that have said they loved me, they never really knew me..not really. I always had myself hidden. They didn't love all of me. They couldn't..they didn't know the real me. Not like Bianca..she knew me. In her vulnerable state..I allowed myself to let my guard down. So if she really loved me..it would mean more to me than anything because she knew me.

"Harry, I really love you. I feel something for you that..I don't have words for. It's precious, this connection we have its just..,"Her voice cracks slightly before she continues,"I fell and you didn't just stand there and watch me fall deeper..you through yourself in and you taught me to fight my way back out. "

"There was no way for me to come out of this without loving you," She adds. I feel my chest tighten under her touch as she affectionately strokes my cheek, looking at me longingly. I just knew that what she was saying, she meant. I clasp my hand over hers and smile.

"You're so beautiful," I whisper, making her smile.

I wrap my arms around her and sleep for the first time, in complete peace because for the first time in a long time, I didn't feel like a complete piece of shit person.

She did that to me. She had gotten better with each passing day and now three months later here we were. I didn't do more for her then she did for me. She brought back something I never knew I was capable of-compassion.

She regained her sanity and strength and I completely changed along with her. I think that's what everyone needs..we need to think outside ourselves in order to even have a clue as to who we really are. Bianca became my every concern for the past three months and I wouldn't have it any other way. She had no idea..all this time she went thinking I saved her when really, she had saved me from the selfish person I saw in the mirror the monster that kept me up at night.

•

I wake up late afternoon to a room filled with sunlight, and the smell of warm amber at my side, Bianca still fast asleep. Her naked, exposed back looks warm and golden with the light shining down on it and I can't but to smile at the memory of last night.

It was real. It happened.

I kiss her shoulder, careful not to wake her before getting out of my bed. I open my drawer to put on the first clean pair of boxers I see before heading down to the kitchen to get some coffee.

With my mug full, the coffee just how I like it, I take it outside to the backyard to sit under the small patio area to stare at the garden a few feet away from me. I sip my coffee, smiling at myself as I replay the night in my head, not a drop of guilt in sight.