Bridgerton - A Girl To Remember

Chapter Seventeen

With sweaty hands a pounding heart I wake up, I had the same nightmare again, it has not left me since our trip to the gallery. The man keeps on returning in my mind and he gets more terrifying every night, I do not get enough sleep and I can feel it. Today is saturday, which means I will head to the horseriding competition auditions and do one of the most exciting, yet scary things I have done in a very long time. I still have not figured out how I will leave the house without making anyone suspicious or worried, it will be one hell of a task.

My maid wakes me up but my eyes have been open for at least one hour, I slowly dress up and go to the dining room for breakfast. I am the last one to join and I apologise,

"My apologies for being late"

"sit down my dear, it is totally fine. I was wanting to talk to you about something, to all of you really. This afternoon the aduitions for the upcoming horseriding begins and Anthony and I thought we could join lady Danbury, who will be there as well. Along with many suitable men for Eloise and Olivia.." Violet says and my eyes grow a little bigger,

"does this mean we can come as well?!" Hyacinth nearly jumps up,

"yes my dear, you can all come" Violet smiles and I can see Benedict looking at me, we lock eyes for a moment and I feel like I just told the my secret, even though my mouth was closed,

"you do not need to go, Olivia, we would all understand if you stay home today" he says comforting and it falls right back in place, this could not be more perfect, with them gone I have all the freedom I want. my shoulders relax and I smile,

"I would have loved to join you all, truly, but I indeed think I prefer staying here" I look down and Eloise lays her hand on my shoulder,

"Although I love having you as my company, men suck, and you have all right to do what you want" I feel safe and in my head I start to form the plan. I will get to the stables a few minutes after they left, I am not the first one to audition so that will not be a problem and then I try to return before they do. If I fail at that, I was apparently taking a very long walk to clear my head, I think it sounds pretty believable. My cheeks start glowing a little when I think about Christian waiting for me at the stables, he supports me, as a woman who wants to ride a horse, against all possible rules and 'regular' behauvior in this society. I may be the one riding the horse but I will never forget how he is risking his own job and therefore income to help me.

A few hours later, with a black coat covering my face and hair, I arrive at the stables, trying hopelessly to avoid any other competitors. Suddenly I feel someone pulling my arm and I get instant flashbacks from the gallery, until I hear Christian's voice,

"come here, quickly" I trust my hand in his and he leads me to a private space. I take off the coat and I can finally look at him, his pleasing smile makes me forget about the drama and I feel confident again when I am wearing my handsome male clothes. We take our time to get the hat right and then it is time for me to leave. Emily is all warmed up and I cannot hold my laughter when the presenter calls my fake name,

"coming next, for the very first time, Mister William Williams" he really could not come up with something better? I enter the course and hear some slight clapping, I scan all the obstacles swiftly and create a map in my head. I hear the whislte and Emily and I start riding, still praying my hat will not fall off halfway and my hear stays tucked under neatly. We get over the obstacles quite easily, Emily is flying today and I am becoming more and more confident we may get to the quarter finals today. 

It is until the last obstacle, which we unfortunately hit, that I am entirely focused on the course and Emily. I hear something on my right and when it comes to me that it is Eloise's voice I cannot help but look to the side. In a tenth of a second I see them, all sitting near each other. Not exactly stunned, but they do not seem unimpressed either. Eloise clapping made me think the hat had fallen off but when I got to the end of the ride I felt it was still in place. Which meant Eloise thought I was good, she did not even know it was me and she still cheered for me...

Chris helps me off Emily and while he takes care of her, I get back in my normal clothes,

"when does the ceremony begin?" I ask,

"in an hour I think, why?"

"well, I have to get back home now, but if I leave I do not know whether I made it through to the next round.."

"I think we both know you did. And otherwise it means you will have to come to the quarter finals anyway, to find out whether you are in or not"

"it felt very odd, I felt like everyone was watching me.."

"they were, Julia, you were not a favourite and you still blew them away"

"do you think someone noticed? that it was me?"

"no, your hat was in place all the time and it covered your face for the biggest part, no one knows Julia, no one knows"

"I guess we might have to fool them at least one more time.." 

"agreed" he holds out his hand, "nice collaborating with you miss Borough"

I shake his hand, "does this mean we will divide the prize if I win?"

"there is no 'if', that prize is yours.."

"ours.."