{DISCLAIMER. THIS CHAPTER IS INSANE AS I WROTE IT WHILE I WAS HALF ASLEEP! The boys will be speaking Russian in this chapter. It will be English translated of course. Keep in mind I don't actually know Russian, (though I'm currently trying to learn the language) so everything written is from Google translate! (Real Russians, please don't kill me if Google translate gets something wrong! I adore y'all, and your country to an unhealthy, but loving degree! XD) Also, Ruv gets drunk here. I know the Canon lore is that he can't get drunk, but THIS IS MY AU! SO I DO WHAT I WANT! XD LET'S GET ON WITH IT THEN, SHAAAAALLL WEEEE?}
Tabi leaned on the counter staring into Ruv's eyes fiercely. Ruv stared back with the same intensity.
Tabi - I bet I can finish this WHOLE bottle of vodka in SECONDS like a TRUE RUSSIAN!
Ruv - Hmm. Famous last words.
Tabi - Is that a CHALLENGE!?!?
Ruv - I don't know.....is it?
Tabi - OH.... IT'S ON!
Both - один..... (one.....)
Два....... (two.....)
ТРИ!!!!! (THREE!!!!!)
They both began to chug the vodka at once. After 12 seconds, they finished at the same time, and smashed the bottles on the floor. They smashed to bits. They didn't care as they yelled wildly. (Ruv yelled in a chill way.)
Tabi - LET'S KEEP GOING!!!
Ruv - Are you sure?.....I don't want to overdo it....
Tabi - NONSENSE! IT'S TOO LATE ANYWAY! WE'RE ALREADY COMMITTED!!!!!!!!
Ruv - Fine.
Ruv sighed as Tabi threw him another bottle. Ruv caught it effortlessly again. They popped the corks out, and begun to chug again.
*Timeskip to ten minutes later...*
Glass strewn the floor, and all the vodka on the table was gone. The boys were drunk as hell. Ruv was a bit more chillax than Tabi, who was laughing like a maniac.
Tabi - ДАВАЙТЕ......ПРОДОЛЖИМ......
(LET'S.....KEEP GOING......)
Ruv - НО....БОЛЬШЕ НЕТ.....
(BUT.....THERE IS NO MORE....)
Tabi shook his head slowly, and stumbled awkwardly over to the lower cabinets next to the sink. He scratched at the door like a cat before it finally opened. He pointed inside. Ruv leaned over the table, and stared at the inside of the cabinet. There were only two very dusty looking old school large bottles of genuine Russian vodka. They were both the same.
Tabi picked one up carefully, and held it up.
Tabi - ЭТИМ, ЗА СОРОК ЛЕТ!
(THESE, ARE OVER FORTY YEARS OLD!)
Ruv - ВЫ УВЕРЕНЫ, ЧТО ОНИ В БЕЗОПАСНОСТИ?
(ARE YOU SURE THEY'RE SAFE?)
Tabi - КОНЕЧНО! СОСТАРИЛСЯ ДО СОВЕРШЕНСТВА!
(OF COURSE! AGED TO PERFECTION!
Ruv shrugged as the vodka didn't put him in the best mindset, and took the old bottle from Tabi. He popped the cork, and sniffed the stale air that vacuumed out of it. The vodka itself smelled fine but....off, in a way. He was about to ask Tabi to second guess this, but as he looked up at his goat headed friend, Tabi was already half way done chugging the forty year old alcohol. Ruv stopped questioning by the safety of drinking vodka this old, and began chugging it as well. They didn't smash the bottles this time, and just set them on the table aggressively. After a couple seconds, they began to feel drowsy. They both stumbled awkwardly into the living room, and stood there staring at the balcony glass door in some weird trance. They felt their brains slow down as they began to hallucinate. Their surroundings shifted as everything morphed into weird shapes, or crudely rendered versions of the objet itself. The colors were off, and flashed, and changed as well. Tabi leaned on Ruv's shoulder as he pointed out into the night.
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The Oreo, and the Goat (an FNF fic)
FanficFirst published - Oct 2021 Ruv, and Tabi become close friends but because of a specific incident that had happened a while back, they have to keep their friendship a secret. Alright! So.....this fic is outdated to my au. My au is the Bro Gang. It's...
