! crappy, trashy, filler chapter ahead ! not necessary at all to read and VERY random !
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Your small, music and alcohol-loving best friend hated the classes he didn't have with you. Yes, he did have other friends, but he just enjoyed your presence. A lot. Luckily, he did have a new friend in some of his classes, one he figured he could bother as much as you.
"Hey, Xiao, did you know (y/n)'s banned from the McDonald's down the street?" Venti asked, turning to his seat neighbor. Their Intro to Theater teacher wasn't out today, due to a doctor's appointment for an ultrasound, so Venti could bother Xiao the whole time.
Xiao turned to Venti and deadpanned. "Sure she is," he said in disbelief.
"I'm serious!" Venti exclaimed. "Want me to tell you?"
Xiao sighed and blinked slowly. "Go ahead."
Venti turned towards the stage, since they were sitting in the chairs of the auditorium, and inhaled. "Okay! So, basically, (y/n) used to work at McDonald's part-time after school. Her shift was always at the cash registers because her boss didn't trust minors with the food. Anyways, she got into a fight with this one guy from a school last year and punched him. Her manager just so happened to be coming out of his office and fired (y/n) and banned her from that McDonald's on the spot."
"Oh."
"So now she doesn't have a job anymore!" Venti cheered.
"Isn't that something to not be happy about...?" Xiao asked, sweatdropping.
"No!" Venti exclaimed, turning to Xiao in horror. "That means she can have spare time to drink with me or play video games with me!"
"You shouldn't be drinking..."
ξo—oξ
Once again, Xiao sat at your table for lunch. It seemed like Venti had just adopted Xiao into being his friend after you tripped that one day.
"Can I try some of your almond tofu, Xiao?" you asked the dark green-haired boy.
He glared at you and pulled his food closer to him. "Never."
"You must love your almond tofu then," you concurred. "You eat it every day and you look so happy when you eat it."
"I guess so..."
"Hey, hey, if you love it so much why don't you marry it?" Tartaglia asked, grinning at Xiao from across the table.
"Shut it," Diluc growled.
"Oh dear brother, do be nice," Kaeya chirped.
"You, too."
"And this is why I'm disowning you when I'm 18."
And for some reason, Zhongli pulled an Uno reverse card out of his pocket.
"What the actual fuck, Zhongli?" Tartaglia asked.
Xingqiu, who was writing some random fanfiction on Wattpad on his phone, looked up and grinned at Zhongli. "Ah, very cultured, I see, Zhongli," he said. "But Diluc should be using it in this position."
"Is that so?" Zhongli asked. He pocketed the card and continued eating. "Maybe I should have tried to persuade my parents to give me access to the internet growing up."
"I think it's better you didn't have any," you inputted.
"So is it better that I did not have access to any memes or this porn everyone is talking about?"
"YES," everyone agreed.
"Alright then," he said. "But can someone explain what 'porn' is?"
"NO."
(*^*)
"(y/n), who in this room do you hate the most?" Tartaglia asked, zooming the camera into your face.
You looked straight into the camera and said, "Kaeya."
Tartaglia zoomed the camera out so everyone could be seen.
"WHAT?! I'M THE MOST BEAUTIFUL AND LOVING BITCH HERE! HOW?" Kaeya exclaimed.
"I just hate you."
"T-the feeling's mutual," Kaeya whimpered, a tear falling from his uncovered eye. "Is it the eyepatch? I'm actually blind in this eye you know."
"Geez, it was a joke, bro."
He sighed a sigh of relief as Tartaglia sat back in his spot in the semicircle of people.
"And, now," he said, "we have a special guest who has agreed to j-"
"I didn't agree to this, only to almond tofu," the special guest interrupted.
"AHEM. We have a special guest who agreed to join us as long as we gave him almond tofu," Tartaglia continued. "Introducing... Xiao!" He looked to the left at the boy who was off-camera. "Psst, come sit down next to (y/n). And then introduce yourself."
"Oh." Xiao walked over to you and sat down, using your head to help him get down without falling. "Hi. I just wanted almond tofu."
"Uh, this is Xiao!" you corrected him. "He goes to school with us and loves almond tofu and he's pleased to meet you!"
"No, I'm no-"
"Okay, Xiao," Tartaglia said. "Who's the dumbest person in this room?"
"The weird guy over there who drinks all day but doesn't get drunk."
"I'm Venti!" Venti protested. "You know my name!"
"Sure. (y/n) give me your number." Xiao turned on his phone and opened up his messages app. "I'm heading home in a bit."
"W-what?" you stuttered. "W-why?!"
"Because we're supposed to go on a date, aren't we?"
You fell backward.
"(y/n).exe has stopped working," Xingqiu, still working on his fanfiction, announced.
