When The Truth Unfolds

His Dirty Ex-Mistress and His Then-Wife

As they make their way towards the hospital entrance, Meredith has long given up reasoning out to her daughter that Derek might probably be busy. Last night, Ellis had hoped Derek showing up at their house so they could watch a movie together but to no avail, he was doing surgery. She wasn't disappointed in him. Although she saw how disappointed her daughter was, she herself was not. It was part of it, being surgeons as parents. Part of her was a little flattered that even in the middle of surgery, he'd still receive her calls, although she knew it was for their daughter.

She was stupid. That was how she described herself. She couldn't sleep for two nights now thinking about their little moment in the grocery store. She thought Derek was still with Addison and yet she let herself succumb to their interaction. And even if they had divorced, Meredith knew there was something going on with him and the woman named Amy. And even if Derek was single, she shouldn't allow herself to go be vulnerable around him again. It wasn't healthy. Those days with him a few years back should be enough, and the pain she had felt, what she had gone through because of him, they were enough. She shouldn't go through that again. She shouldn't be feeling whatever she was feeling.

"Okay, so what did you do?" Cristina's voice suddenly popped up and brought her out of her thoughts.

"I didn't do anything," she denied, wondering how she guessed she did something stupid.

Cristina pressed the up button and three of them were waiting for the elevator, "Oh! Common, Meredith. Out with it already!" she impatiently said.

Meredith then let go of Ellis's hand, not wanting for her to hear what she was about to admit. Her daughter then stood in front of the other elevator, wandering.

Releasing a long sigh, "I almost kissed Derek the other day," she whispered in a flat tone.

Cristina let out a sharp breath, "You almost kissed Derek the other day."

She nodded, "No, I kissed Derek the other day," she was not sure. She too was confused if that was a kiss or not. Or if grazing each other's lips was considered kissing.

"You kissed Derek the other day," Cristina repeated.

"Cristina!" she snapped at her friend, "Why are you repeating what I am saying?"

"I'm sorry. I'm just trying to wrap my mind around it," her friend said defensively, "So what did he say?"

As the elevator opened, Ellis came rushing to her side.

Relieved that no one will join the ride, she spoke, "We didn't get to talk. His girlfriend showed up."

"What?" Cristina asked in surprise, "Shepherd has a girlfriend?"

"Looks like it," she replied shrugging.

"And you're jealous now," Cristina stated boldly.

Meredith frowned at turned to look at her friend, "I am not jealous," she hissed.

"You so are."

"I am not!" she was annoyed, "And why didn't you tell me about his divorce from Addison? How long now?"

It was Cristina's turn to sigh, "Meredith, you never opened up about the past since you got here. How am I supposed to know if you would like to know what happened in the past five years?" she said, suddenly her voice became soft, "But do you really wanna know?"

Meredith sighed again and did not give her any response as she herself was not sure if she would like to know how Derek took her disappearance, how had he been all those years. The tiny voice in her would like to know, but the bigger voice said that if they talk about it, she'd have to talk about her sufferings too. It was something she was not near ready to tell and probably never. She had buried the memories deep down in her heart and had no intention of visiting them.