addicted to you [dnf fanfic]

so this is it?~chp 18~

tw/cw: mature content, overdose,
(if there's any grammar / spelling errors my bad i wrote this on my phone)

George slams his lips against mine. What the hell is he doing? I thought he hated me? God I don't care if he hates me or not, I just want to make him feel good. I place my hand on his waist, looping my fingers through his belt loops, pulling him closer to me. I bite his lip which makes him moan; allowing me to slip my tongue into his mouth.

George shoves me backward, "What the fuck!"

"You're the one who kissed me lover boy."

"Oh just shut up Clay! Just leave. Please." I don't know how I would argue this one. I see tears forming in his eyes but don't say anything. He doesn't want me here. He doesn't need me anymore. I head towards his door and turn my head back one more time while twisting the knob; he just stares at me. I guess it's time to say goodbye.

-few hours later- 8:30pm

Maybe this was my fault. I'm a fucking mess with all this drug shit and I know it can't get any better from here. I'm in too deep. Maybe I should text George before this goes to shit. I try but it doesn't even send. Weird. Might as well text Stella. I sit up on my bed, back resting against my pillow as I swing my feet to the ground. I pull out the box. Well here goes nothing. I lift open the lid and look through everything, seeing what there is. There's no way I could end it all by just stabbing myself. I laugh. I don't know why I did, it just felt right.

I pick up the phone and click me and Stellas last message.

Hey pretty girl

hi clay. what's up?

I just need someone to talk too.

It's been a few minutes and she hasn't responded yet, might as well start right now. I grab a random pill bottle and twist the safety lid off. Pouring a little less than a hand full, I set them down and find some old ass drink on my nightstand to swallow these things. Taking all of the pills, I poor them down my throat and drink whats in the cup. Shit. This is old ass vodka. I check my phone again to see a text from Stella.

what's up? did something happen to u and george?

The affect of the pills still obviously haven't kicked in so I look through the box in one hand, texting her with the other.

He said he doesjt want a rrelwshinship anymore.

dude. what the fuck did you just. anyways. just give him space. don't fuck it up anymore.
Although I don't see that text since I already was grabbing mini flasks filled with alcohol and chugging them one by one. 10 to be exact.

clay?

Shitttt my b. Forgot to respong.

dude is everything all right? For a stupid ass reason I decide to spill everything out, maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe I just needed someone to talk too.

Bro nahhhh. This alcohol taste like ass fr fr😂😂

clay what the hell?? you better be playing rn.

Bitch relaaax. My hands are shaking like crazy when I type that. I don't know how old this shit is but it is definitely bad. I grab an Advil bottle from in the box and twist off the lid with ease, pouring lots more than I should in my hand. Gulping that down with the rest of the bad alcohol. I deserved what was coming for me right. My heart was basically jumping out of my chest, but in a bad way. It felt like I was getting stabbed multiply times.

clay?!?! i live so fucking far from you dude you better be joking i will drive down there right now.

Eyes rolling in the back of my head I could barely see what she was saying. They come into focus as I get some concerned texts from Stella and George.

Stella texted me what was happening. What the fuck are you doing. I'm driving over right now. Lucky for George he lived pretty close to Clay. A good 10 minute drive.

clay please! i just called george. please just be okay. for him. for you. for me.

I almost think of responding when my mouth started foaming up mixed with the alcohol. Did I really want to die right now. I deserved too anyways. What Stella is saying is bullshit. I take more sips of the alcohol, making me start to throw up a little. My head felt like I was getting shot so many fucking times. My heart basically stopped beating. I couldn't help but feel like I was doing good in the world. Me leaving it would be the best option. Tears streaming down my face as I fall onto the floor, taking a few more pills even though my stomach can't take it. George bursts through the door, screaming. But for what.

As I'm slowly blacking out, all I hear is George screaming and crying, shaking me. Like that will ever do something. Foam is dribbling out of my mouth at this point. Beep beep beep. He must be dialing something.I'm coughing it up, choking on my own throw up.

"Hi, yes. My boyfriend, he-he overdosed!!" George breaks down.

Isn't this what you wanted. Isn't this what everyone wanted. For me to be gone. I mean what could I say, I was obsessed, I was addicted to you.