Ruins

Thirteen

~How can the dead be truly dead when they still love in the souls of those who left behind.~

I was waiting on a response from William where there was a letter but there was no response until there was a letter that came where Benelia read it so I was shocked because she didn’t know how to tell me this until she made me read it where it says William is dead.

I felt on the ground crying knowing I have lost William forever and I didn't know what to do anymore since now I am going to be a mother soon with no father to represent my child. William has left me without seeing our child's eyes let alone touch his or her hand. I couldn’t bear to hear this again where people were starting to tell me they are sorry for my loss but nobody knows how much this loss caused me.

I felt weak and more sick as I was progressing through my pregnancy, even grieving since now I am a widow carrying my dead husband's child.  

I didn't know what to do anymore other than to think about suicide. There was a letter that Benelia gave me where Oliver wanted to come to see me but I didn't want to see him but he insisted on it.

Oliver was on his way coming to Alexandria while I was busy worrying about William and what he caused me in this situation. Benelia has to attend all of my meetings since the death of William has took a toll on me and I wished it hadn't but he hurt me like fucking brick. I wasn't ready to face anymore but I needed support from my dear  cousin since she finds it better to live here than go back to her hometown.

Edward has been supporting me as well where he makes sure I am well taken care of with all the care I need at this moment. Oliver's arrival was yet the biggest scene ever where people think he came here to marry me since now William is gone which is not true. 

"Where is she?" He asks.

"Oliver, I don't think she wants to see you." Benelia told him but he was not taking no for an answer because william was his best friend who fell in love with the woman who couldn't have.

Oliver knocked on my door where I didn't want to be bothered when he entered himself into my room making people think we were having an affair.

"Get out!" I shouted.

"Ophelia, get up now." He says.

"Oliver, I don't want to see you let alone speak to you." I said.

"Get your ass up, Ophelia!" He shouted at me like I was some dog to him when he knew he had one at home which was his wife and not me. Oliver came on my bed embracing me telling me he is sorry for my loss but he realized he has a loss as well because William was his best friend and he feels that we should get closer and honor William for who he was.

At that moment, I would say I needed a hug from Oliver knowing it was okay to feel sad. I got up from bed from all this time I was in it soaking into my fears and sorrows all alone.

Oliver told me he will leave me because he wants to support me through this all. I was wondering why he would help me when he is supposed to be doing all of this with his wife and kid. I slowly got the hang of things while Benelia was still attending my meetings with Parliament even though I wish I was the one to do it, but my strength has no recovery and I don't think it will ever be better for me.

William was there to hold my hand through the bad times, good times with me and now I am left alone to fend it off for myself but people who surrounded me told me to not think like that. 

I couldn't help plan the funeral since William kept popping back into my mind of how he was taken away too early from me. I received a letter from his family where they are coming to see me so they can speak to me about William and his child since they knew I was with child the moment William sent words to them.