Poems and such

Smile

It's something else, seeing a smile break free from a dear friend's face.

As in slow motion, the corner of their lips stretch to the sides and curve upwards at the commissure of their lips; the way their brows lower themselves as the body automatically narrows their eyes, seeming to make them smaller in size.

For me, seeing her smile was like a white whale. Do not be confused, I had seen her smile (if it can be called that), but I craved more. Her smile always seemed off, like she was holding back on showing happiness, or perhaps, she was forcing herself to act happy; nevertheless, I craved to see a truthful smile take over her facial features. Those types of smiles that no matter how hard you try to hold back they spring free and brighten the person's face like a child's face on Christmas day. Smiles that make a light rosy color dust over their cheeks as if they're slightly embarrassed or so happy their heart is drumming out a concert, and their eyes become a lighter color filled with the sparkle of living life in joy. Yeah..., if I could get her to flash me one of those, no matter how little time it lasted, I would be the happiest.

I don't know if it's because she was a shy girl or because of some situation I had no knowledge of, but her smiles, even if they seemed big, they barely flashed content to me. I yearned for a smile that would shine so bright it would be seen from outer space.

With a mission in mind and the determination of a warrior setting ablaze inside me, I worked to achieve my dream.

I stayed by her side, watching her, paying attention to what made her tick. To what made her frown, what made her laugh, and what made her cry. It was then that my suspicion was proved right; she didn't smile much and half the time when she did, they were fake. Some might get discouraged by this realization but for me, it fueled my desire, turning it into a need. This wasn't for me, it was for her.

Time passed and we grew closer. My mission changed over that period of time. Not because my determination grew weak but because I understood her better. It was wrong of me to assume that all smiles are the same.

I remember it crystal clear, the day I understood.

It was the beginning of winter, and with the weather growing colder each day she started to dress with long sleeves. It was on a Tuesday, right after last period. She was by the lockers taking out a black jacket, leather I noticed. I walked over to her and waited till she was ready.

"Nice jacket"

My comment was simple, for I had not put much thought into my words.

"Thanks, it's new!"

Up to this day, I don't know how she didn't notice my awestruck face. Was it the winter wind or something else that made a chill shot through my body like electricity?

I stood in front of her with my mouth agape, like a fish out of the water.

Her eyes closed and cheeks rosy she smiled at me with the gentlest of smiles. And this time, it was real. Pure like a child's curiosity she gave me a closed-mouth smile.

It took me a second to come back to my senses - since her beauty made me live and out of body experience -, but when I did,

I grinned back at her. "It suits you"