Always Hurting (One Direction Story)

Misery

HI :D HERE'S CHAPTER TEN

WARNING: Extremely graphic self harm and suicide.

Harry's POV

The next day, I waited impatiently in my room while Louis got ready for his date with Jordan. Today was going to be the day that I would decide whether I would live or die. Today was the day when I would find out if I could ever trust Louis again. I really hoped I could. My biggest wish is to have him back and go back to the way we used to be.

I was snapped out of my thoughts when I heard Louis's voice from downstairs.

"I'll be back later," I heard him say. "Don't miss me to much."

"Trust me, we won't," I heard Liam say.

After I heard Louis leave, I decided to wait a few minutes before following him. I didn't want him to see me. My plan wouldn't work if he did.

When enough time had passed, I started walking to the restaurant. When I got there, I looked through one of the windows and saw Louis sitting down at a booth with someone else, who I assume was Jordan. They were both sitting on the same side of the booth. I crouched down in front of the window to spy on them.

I noticed that Louis looked exceptionally good today. He was wearing his favorite striped shirt. My heart sunk as I realized he was trying to look good for Jordan. 

I studied Jordan closely. What does he have that I don't have? I look a million times better than him and I bet I can treat Louis better than he ever could.

Right now, they were talking and laughing. I wish I could hear what they're saying, but I can't through the window. They look like they're having a good time. I can feel myself dying inside...

Louis's POV

Me and Jordan were at the restaurant, waiting for our food to arrive.

I was having fun but I was really missing Harry. I remembered the time when me and him had come to this restaurant. I really hoped he was okay and wouldn't cut himself today. I felt bad for not talking to him about it yet. I decided I would later tonight, even though I doubt he'll listen to me.

Jordan must have been able to tell I was unhappy because he asked me what was wrong.

"I'm just really worried about Harry," I told him.

"He hasn't forgiven you yet?"

"No, and yesterday I found out he's been cutting himself." I wanted to cry just saying those words.

"Oh yeah, I heard about that on the news," Jordan said. 

"It's all my fault. I never meant to hurt him. Ever."

"Can't you guys at least be friends? Then maybe you can talk to him about his cutting."

"I doubt he even wants to be friends. He wants nothing to do with me." I looked at the ground sadly.

We sat in silence for a few minutes. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Jordan staring at me.

"I really hate seeing you sad Louis," he said at last. "I bet I can help you take your mind off of Harry."

"How?" I asked doubtfully.

He started rubbing his hand on my leg underneath the table.

"We could go back to my place and have some fun," he smirked.

I shuddered. After what happened with Brandon, there was no way I was ready for that yet.

He leaned in closer and whispered in my ear, "I can help you feel better."