The Girl With The Purple Glasses

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Oh Harry.

Its been about 2 months and you havent gotten sick of me yet? I must be doing something right. Over the past couple of weeks I have sent him on a emotional roller coaster ride that he could fall off of any time he wants. But he doesnt, he sticks right by my side. He holds my hands in the times I need it most. Kisses me even when I dont expect him to. We tell eachother, "till death do us part" but he doesnt leave it at just death, he told me the other night, 'fuck till death do us part, im with you forever." That man is the best. The only things hes missing is a job and a car, add those two things and hed be even more beyond perfect. But untill those things sprout up ill be sticking by his side till the very end, "For richer or poorer."

I adore this man, he treats me how a woman should be treated. we act like we're already married, if im sick he takes care of me if he's sick i take caare of him. It's a mutual thing. "In sickness and heath." I can just picture Harry and i sitting on our new pourch swing as our little boy and girl run around the yard chasing bubbles.

-----sick in the summertime-----

I was born in july which makes me a summer baby, I love me some sun! this cold is stupid, I cant smell anything so all food taste werid, I cant breath, I cough, I have headaches and can barely hear. Eerrr, I need some nightquil and dayquil. is it werid or do other people kind of like it when your sick because that means you dont have to do anything and people just do stuff for you? because I find it pleasing. Like with harry, if we didnt live 24 mins away from eachother he'd be here right now feeding me chicken noodle soup giving me some nyquil and cuddling me all night. he'd be cattering to me. i love that about him. Any other guy wouldnt even dream of taking care of my disgusting ass. Even a shower doesnt help make me feel less disgusting.

On my period he even helpped me threw it. He would place his hand right on my lower stomach and push. He would hold it there for me threw the night and day, if I got up to use the restroom he'd fallow with me hand still pressed on my lower stomach. I appreciate the little things he does for me and the way me puts up with me is just quite amazing.

I want to travel. Travel and see the world and all it's beauty. I want to have adventures and party, and meet new people, I want to get a real feel of the world and all it has to offer. I just need a buddy, and my buddy is harry. He's already made me see so much. Remeber those long drives I talked about, yeah those were adventures. So manything happened during those drives. I wish we still did, but times are differnt. Times have changed and I dont know how to fix them. I guess it happened when I lost my job, well I mean i quit more than lost it. I would at a food resturant where I helped make food and I had thrown up on myself yet they thought it was ok to still let me work. I looked at that manager and said, "are you crazy?" all she said was no.

I wanted to smack her so hard then. You cant have someone try to work with food and close the resturant at the same time with throw up on her. That's a health risk as is. so now that I quit there I have to find a new job. And Harry does too. we both applied to this one hotel called Le Meridian. Now looking at the name I thought 'ehh this'll just be some random unknow hotel I got this.' but boy I tell you, as soon as we got there with harry and I felt way under dressed and not in a normal persons hotel. This hotel was just amazing. the stone gas fire plase in the lobby the nice classical music playing threw out the hotel, the vallet, the door man. it all was so much. "Malia? I would love to work in a place like this." Harry said as we walked out, we wearied but still liked because in the end we never got the job. We really wouldn't fit in.

In about September or so of 2015, Harry started a job at a close by kroger, and I stated a job at a collection agency. Now I already stress and am depressed most of my days, so I know this doesn't sound fantastic for me but it pays nice. Harry was ok with his job besides the higher up managers and such didn't seem to know how to train someone. They also didn't know respect. They would lie to him about his hours, made him stay longer on most days. Threatening his job if he didn't work them. Already he was working the 3rd shift so it was already a horrible position.

Let's just say he doesn't work there anymore. And currently I don't work at the collection job. Let me tell you a little about them.... when I started in September I loved the job had lots to offer. Now in June of 2016 my depression and self hate have never been stronger.

Since I started working there my life has not gotten any better. I am going on 20, still live at home currently no car (thanks car accident) and am broke till I start my new job. Oops! Did I for get to say, I quit! Yes oh yes I quit after only 10 months of working there I figured my heath is more important than listening to people across the country complain to me about their financial problems and life problems while I deal with my own. Now I know you're probably thinking "Gezz you're so mean" well you'd understand once you've daily talked to over 100 people a week to collect debt they couldn't pay or forgot to pay. I've never been the mean one on the phone, so don't smack my hands with a ruler just yet. I always was/ still am nice and considerat to others.

That company and its rules were all do much. Since I have worked there I now have this problem where once I start thinking about too much at once time, I began to feel overwhelmed quickly like a wave. Never have I been this bad. It's like ptsd.... but in a much suddeler way.

Any who enough with my rant, back to Harry. After kroger he hasn't had much luck. From the time he quit there, I wanna say November possibly, he hasn't had a job. It's not that he's not trying it's that he doesn't have transportation.

----------------June-------------

Ahh June, this month I have quit and gotten a new job. I start Friday the 1st of July actually! I'm super excited. It's a grocery store type one that has lots of differnt things that are in bulk. Better part Harry has an interview at the same place I just got the job! I'm so proud!!!!

So maybe next time I won't be so short, maybe a bit slower of a jump in an update!