Only Love

Chapter 6

Perrie's POV:

The day after the fiasco, I wake up with an unbearable headache. I should have never drunk so much.

I slowly stand up and make my way to the kitchen to get some coffee. Everything feels like it's happening in slow motion. I'm a total mess.

Just when I'm about to sit down, someone knocks on my door. A groan leaves my mouth as I reluctantly stumble towards the door.

My hand reaches for the door but stops halfway. What if it's Jade? I cannot face her after yesterday. The idea of seeing her face right now almost sends me right into a panic attack.

There's another knock. "Come on, Edwards." Jesy.

I release my breath and open the door to let my best friend in. She looks surprisingly good, seeing how much she was drinking yesterday. "Hey, Pez, you feeling better?" The older girl says as she walks in.

"Huh?" The confusion is evident in my voice, but let's face it, I can't pretend I'm not completely dying right now.

"Yeah, I was a little worried after your text, but I figured you just needed a good night of sleep." Right, I texted Jesy to say I wasn't feeling very well.

That wasn't a lie. I was feeling horrible. And now I feel even worse.

Jesy and I sit down in the kitchen and she is looking at me expectantly. "I did something stupid," I mumble and hide my face in my hands.

My mind goes back to last night. How could I have been so stupid? Okay, Jade was maybe dancing on the line between friendship and something more, but she was drunk out of her mind. All four of us jokingly flirt with each other all the time. Of course, it didn't mean that she would just suddenly want to kiss me. Stupid, delusional, drunk me.

My stomach turns when I picture Jade's face right after I kissed her. That was definitely not a good face. I jump up and run to the bathroom to empty my stomach in the toilet.

Jesy's footsteps follow me and she grabs my hair just in time. "That's so gross. Good thing I love you," she says as she rubs my back soothingly.

Tears stream down my face and I'm not entirely sure they are only forming because of the vomiting. When I feel like I'm done, I rest my face on the cool lid of the toilet.

I close my eyes for a second, but Jesy shakes my shoulder lightly and when I look up, her eyes are filled with concern. "Are you okay, Pez?"

Shakily I stand up and walk to the couch with Jesy's arm wrapped protectively around my waist. "I'll get you some water." She says when I'm sitting down.

In the blink of an eye, she is back by my side with a huge glass of water which I take gratefully. "So, what happened yesterday?"

I take a big gulp of my water and then turn to Jesy. "As you know, I drank a lot yesterday. Basically, drunk me was being delusional and I thought Jade was giving me all these signals, which she clearly wasn't. And uhm... I-I kissed her."

My eyes stay fixed on my lap, but when Jesy stays quiet, I look up at her. Her eyes are wide, but her concern is still evident. "What was her reaction?"

"Well, obviously, she didn't kiss me back. She thought I was just looking for a release after Alex, so I just went with that and kind of ran out."

Jesy slowly nods her head up and down, processing the information. "Okay, that's not so bad, to be honest. When I think about it, I wouldn't even find it that weird if Leigh would kiss me, so maybe she doesn't think much of it either."

"But Jes, even if she doesn't think it was weird, I don't think I can be around her anymore. What if sober me starts getting delusional too? I don't trust myself around her anymore." A loud sigh escapes my lips after that sentence. Not being able to feel comfortable with someone who you've known and loved for so long is a really disarming feeling.