Percy Jackson and the Department of Mysteries [Book 5]

3) Kids, Do Not Toast (Microwave) Forks

"Oh — yeah," Harry looked down at his mess and started shoving things into his trunk.

"Don't be stupid, It'll be much quicker if I — pack!" Tonks cried, making a sweeping movement over the floor. Everything that was lying around flew into the air and landed in Harry's trunk.

"It's not very neat," I observed, still lying on the bed.

"Yeah," Tonks peered into the trunk. "My mum's got this knack of getting stuff to fit itself in neatly — she even gets the socks to fold themselves — but I've never mastered how she does it — it's a kind of flick —" she flicked her wand hopefully, and the sock gave a sad little wiggle.

"Ah, well," Tonks slammed the lid shut as Harry pulled me off of his bed, "at least it's all in. That could do with a bit of cleaning, too — Scourgify —" A few feathers and droppings disappeared as Tonks pointed her wand at Hedwig's cage. "Well, that's a bit better — I've never quite got the hang of these sort of householdy spells. Right — got everything? Cauldron? Broom? Wow! A Firebolt?" Her eyes were wide as she stared at the broom held in Harry's hand. "And I'm still riding a Comet Two Sixty. Ah well... wand still in your jeans? Both buttocks still on? Okay, let's go. Locomotor Trunk."

Harry's trunk lifted a few inches off the ground. Tonks carried Hedwig in her left hand and held her wand in her right. Harry sent me a weirded out look, and I knew I'd be harassed for answers at some point.

"Quit messing with the microwave, Sturgy," I said as we walked into the kitchen.

"This isn't a microwave, it's a toaster," Sturgis said.

"That is a microwave," I said, unimpressed.

"But Remus says it toasts stuff!"

"I did not say that," Lupin said, sealing an envelope. He leaned over and whispered to me. "I did say that."

"Oh," I said, fighting down a grin. "Sorry, my bad. It's just been so long since I've used a mic— toaster. Could you show me how it works? I wanna see it toast something."

"We've got about a minute," Lupin said. "We should probably get out into the garden so we're ready. Harry, I've left a letter telling your aunt and uncle not to worry —"

"They won't," Harry said.

"That you're safe —"

"That'll just depress them."

"— and you'll see them next summer."

"Do I have to?"

Lupin smiled.

Kingsley jumped as the microwave beeped loudly beside him, "What does that mean? Why is it beeping?"

"It means the toaster is going to blow up if we don't take the right precautionary measures!" I hissed. "Hurry! Only toasting a metal fork can save us now! And make sure it's metal, or it won't work!"

Harry promptly reached over and unplugged the microwave.

"Oh," I said dryly. "I suppose that works, too."

"Come here, boy," Moody said gruffly, beckoning Harry over with his wand. "I need to Disillusion you."

"You need to what?" Harry sounded concerned.

"Disillusionment Charm," Moody raised his wand. "Lupin says you've got an Invisibility Cloak, but it won't stay on while we're flying; this'll disguise you better. Here you go —"

He hit Harry on the top of the head, and Harry started to change. His body wasn't exactly invisible. It had taken on the exact color and texture of the wall behind him.

"Nice one, Mad-Eye," I nodded appreciatively. Most Disillusionment Charms didn't work nearly as nicely.

"Come on," Moody unlocked the back door with his wand, and we stepped into the Dursley's yard.

"Where's your broom?" Harry asked me as we walked out.

"I'm riding with you," I said.

"Why?"

"Well, it would be really odd for people to see a broom without a rider," I paused. "Plus, it's the only argument I could come up with for Sturgis — he didn't want me to come."

"Why not?" Harry frowned.

"I think it's 'cause I'm young," I shrugged. "He's acted that way for every Order meeting I've invaded, and has even questioned Dumbledore about his judgement for my place in whatever his grand plan is."

"What's your place?" Harry asked.

"You're not gonna like it, so I'm not gonna tell you," I said.

"Clear night," Moody said, staring up at the sky. "Could've done with a bit more cloud cover. Right, you," he barked at Harry, "we're going to be flying in close formation. Tonks'll be right in front of you, keep close on her tail. Lupin'll be covering you from below. I'm going to be behind you. The rest'll be circling us. We don't break rank for anything, got me? If one of us is killed —"

"Is that likely?" Harry frowned, but Moody ignored him.

"— the others keep flying, don't stop, don't break ranks. If they take out all of us and you survive, Harry, the rear guard are standing by to take over; keep flying east and they'll join you."

"Stop being so cheerful, Mad-Eye, he'll think we're not taking this seriously," Tonks said, harnessing Harry's things to her broom.

"But we aren't taking this seriously," I said. "Sirius isn't here."

"I'm just telling the boy the plan," Moody said. "Our job's to deliver him safely to headquarters and if we die in the attempt —"

"No one's going to die," Kingsley said.

"Mount your brooms, that's the first signal!" Lupin said, pointing towards the sky. A shower of bright red sparks had taken refuge up with the stars.

Harry climbed onto his broom and I climbed on behind him.

"I hope Zeus doesn't smite us," I said thoughtfully.

"What?" Harry's voice cracked as he looked back at me.

"Ah, last time I was on a broom that wasn't mine Zeus nearly struck me down," I shrugged. "I don't think he wants me dead, though. My dad would kill him, and plus, he would probably prefer me over Nico being the prophecy child." I frowned. "Well, he might get angry in the heat of the moment."

"I'm getting off," Harry said decidedly.

"Second signal, let's go!" Lupin said loudly as green sparks shot into the air.

I kicked off, sending us into the air before Harry could stop us.

So on my ACTAspire thing, I got a perfect score in science. My sister wasn't really that impressed. Then she saw I was in the 100th percentile for science, and was like Woooooow. Duh. Of course I'm in that percentile, I didn't get any wrong. My guessing skills are unparalleled. I just find it odd that she hadn't come to that conclusion earlier. I just got a message from my step mom saying that we now have Disney+. That's awesome. I will watch the Marvel movies, and Star Wars, and the Percy Jackson tv series of that ever actually comes out, which I really hope it does. My mom read the PJO books. I got her to read The Sword of Hades? I think that's what it's called. Then she can read HoO, and I'm excited for that. I am living vicariously through her. Her first time reading these books is now my first time reading them. Yeehaw.