Drowning (1st book)

23. Goodbye

I stare at Asher's body as it slowly disintegrates.

Why? Why does the thing I love the most, die?

I'm a fucking curse.

It's your fault, Rose!

Maybe if I wouldn't be alive, he wouldn't have died.

Before I start thinking suicidal thoughts, Gretta- or Anoplia, appears with a cloud of grey smoke.

"Your in my cage!" I exclaim.

"No shit Sherlock!" She sarcastically mutters.

I would usually send her a death glare, but I'm not myself right now.

I'm really not myself.

"Do you want to get out of here, or what?" she asks.

This time I glare at her.

"I'm going to have to go with 'or what'," I say with no expression.

"Okay, I know you don't want to leave Asher's body," she begins, and then looks at his body to see he's a pile of ashes," or what's...left of him."

I stand straight up and glare into her eyes.

"Why would I go with you?" I inquire.

She smirks.

"I've changed sides, I've realized that if I bring you home; the Devil will not have your consent. That means he can't come through the lake to torture you!"

I give her an incredulous look.

"Who will protect me from the minor demons?" I ask.

"Me!" she smirks.

I look down at the floor.

"I can't."

She rolls her eyes.

"You can't leave a pile of ashes? Come on!" she says and then grabs my hand.

"No!" I fight back.

I struggle and try to grip the bars of my cage.

"Asher!"

I scream and cry until Anoplia and I reappear by my lake.

It's pouring rain. The rain is so hard it feels like someone is punching me.

"See! We're safe!" Anoplia exclaims.

I turn her around and slap her.

She doesn't flinch, but I needed to do that.

"HOW DARE YOU! I LOVE HIM! YOU BITCH!" I scream.

I fall chest down on the grass and pound my fists into the ground.

Where are you Asher? I need you!

How could you leave?

I sob so hard a hiccup.

I can't do this! I can't live!

The rain pounds on my back.

I imagine him kissing me. Our bodies touching. His hands cupping my cheek.
His soft lips. My hands run through his hair. His kisses trailing up my jawline and moving lower.

I let my fingers graze my lips imagining he's touching them.

His body isn't even intact anymore.

I want just one more minute. One more 'I love you'. One more glance. One more touch.

I feel an empty pit threatening to swallow me whole.

Just to lay beside him, one more time.

To feel his radiating warmth. To listen to him breathe.

To feel the soft caress of his hands on my body.

I want him back! Now! I need Asher Dorian!

I push myself up to a sitting position.

Anoplia is gone.

Tears blur my vision.

I stumble to my feet.

"Rose," I hear him whisper.

I don't know whether I'm imagining this or not, but its my last chance to see him.

"Where are you?" I scream over the rain.

I run around in circles.

"Rose," I hear again, but this time I know I'm deluding myself.

I fall to my knees and let my head hang.

"Your still with me," I cry out into the darkness.

And just for a second, I actually believe it.

THE END OF BOOK ONE
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