Fuck You, Nicely

Shorten the leash, see where it gets you

I live in comfort.
I've been blessed with a life in which I am allowed to to pace myself
Sadly the display of my bloom is slow
Internally I'll feel about ready to sprout my wings when it's decided I've been given enough time already
How close I get every time
Comically close
On the edge with invisible wings ready to spread and sword strapped to my waist
As said, maybe you gave too long of a leash
Too much freedom
So you pull me back
Yanking me with a loud voice
Questions stab at me with context from months ago
Past is in the past doesn't apply here?
"It's your track record"
Fuck off, honestly
Please
I just need myself
What are you doing?
Finding myself
"Do you know what the definition of insanity is?"
No
"Doing the same thing and expecting a different result."
But im not, I was sad- im no longer sad. Thoughts flow and come to conclusions, they didn't do that before
I know I don't need medications I know I don't need some voodoo shit
I just need my own thoughts
I have logic that now speaks louder than- than, dark thoughts, I guess
You bring up my age like im old
You bring up school like it's almost over
I go to my room and talk continues like I'll get some revolution from your words
You bring up my stubbornness and talk like this is the only thing forbidding me from doing what you want
I don't care what you want
Its my selfishness but I feel like im doing better than I have in a while. You talk like I've fallen and your claws are what going to help me get out
Im not you
Your not me
Insanity
You do the same things every time and it doesn't work
Are you expecting a different result?

I'll make sure you don't get it now.