Old Habits Die Hard

7

Barry hid in his room for the rest of the day. Or, attempted to. After school, Marley softly knocked on his door. "Barry?" she said, pushing the door open a little. He didn't look at her, just played with the new bandages on his arms. "Are you okay?"

"I don't want to talk about it," Barry muttered.

"I'm just worried about you," Marley stated, sitting on the edge of his bed. "You can talk to me, you know that, right?"

"I can't talk about it," Barry said. "I don't even want to think about it, let alone talk about it."

"Is it about what happened in Central City?" Marley asked. "Like your shoulder."

"It has nothing to do with Central City," Barry said. "It was fine there, unlike...I said I don't want to talk about it. Please, Marley."

"Okay," she replied. "I have good news."

"What?" Barry asked, glad she was trading topics.

"I got into glee," she said.

"Really?" he replied, smiling, though it was half hearted. "That's great."

"You got in, too," she said.

Barry paused, "Wait, what?" He asked her in shock.

"Yeah-" Marley's voice got drowned out by...something.

"I really like you Vanessa."

"What?" Barry asked her.

Marley looked at him in confusion. "I said, '' Yeah, but they were making fun of my mom today. Like everyone else..."

"Oh." Barry said, shaking his head slightly, pushing his thoughts aside for the time being. "That's pretty out of character for them." He commented. "A little while ago I got curious and googled the New Directions. Apparently they came in last place after two of them kissed on stage. So they were probably bullied for that."

"Yeah, definitely." Marley agreed.

"But then again...they're 'big shots' now. Friends with the jocks and cheerleaders. As someone who dated a cheerleader once, I can confirm that they are not good people." Barry added.

Marley nodded for a moment but then paused, "Wait...you dated a cheerleader?" She asked in surprise.

"For, like, a month," Barry said. "Then she broke up with me for another guy."

"Well, she lost out," Marley stated. "Because you're the most amazing guy I know."

"Thanks, Marley," Barry stated, trying not to let his brain go in a downward spiral again. "I- uh- I'm really tired. I might go to sleep, take a nap."

"Okay," Marley frowned, but stood up. "Sleep well."

"Not likely," he muttered to himself.

"What?"

"Nothing, thanks for checking on me."

Marley gave him a small smile. "Want me to shut the light off?"

He nodded. "Thanks."

Marley nodded before stepping out and shutting the door.

Now that Marley had left, Barry was left alone in the darkness. Alone with his thoughts at least...

He turned onto his side and shut his eyes, he fell asleep rather quickly due to the exhausting day he had.

"Vanessa Redlynn. Two N's." A girl said with a smile, putting two fingers in front of her face.

"Why do you always listen to her?"

"Do you think you could break your rule for one night?"

"Give me your thumb."

"Chris?"

"Chris?"

"Are you awake?"

Barry's eyes flew open, and he could see nothing in the nearly pitch dark room. He shut them again and groaned, covering his face with his hands. God, no, they were coming back. He'd managed so long without having one, he hated these nightmares. He hated waking up in a cold sweat, he hated the way his arms itched and the fear that lingered for hours after, often preventing him from returning to sleep.

What time was it even?

He grabbed his phone and the screen lit up. 8:37. He'd slept much longer than he'd intended to, he doubted there would be any sleep tonight, regardless of the nightmare.

"I know what we can do...we can make a hot video..."

"Shut up..." Barry whispered.

"How much do you love me, Chris?"

"Stop it..."

"Vanessa! Where are you?"

"Stop it!"

"Barry?" Marley said from across the hall, then was in his room. The light turned on and he winced at the sudden light. "Sorry, are you okay?"

"What?" he asked.

"You said stop it," Marley said. "Are you okay?"

"Uh, yeah," Barry lied. "Yeah, I just...my phone was doing some weird thing, I'm good."

"Are you sure?" Marley asked. Barry nodded.

"Yeah, don't worry about it."

"Okay," Marley replied with a small frown. "Are you hungry? Mom and I already have dinner but there are leftovers you can warm up."

Barry shook his head. "No, not right now, but I'll get something if I do get hungry," he said, knowing he wouldn't.

"You better," Marley said.

Marley turned away from him and left the room, shutting the door behind her.

"You're just like your father."

Barry flinched slightly, "Damn it..." He muttered. In an attempt to get his mind away from...those memories...he signed into his phone and just started scrolling through social media. Not that he had a lot considering he practically deleted everything when he transferred. He went to his instagram profile, where he had a grand total of three posts. One was a picture of him and Marley when he visited her and Millie before sophomore year. They both looked younger in it, and Barry didn't have the haunted look in his eyes that was present very often now. The second post was a picture of Iris, taken one day over the summer after sophomore year, when he'd finally managed to feel comfortable leaving the house again, and the last one was taken a month ago with Iris before he'd left for Lima. He sighed. He missed his best friend.

Maybe you shouldn't have hung up on her the other day, his brain said. Maybe he should just try sleep again.

_____

We're not sure if this chapter needed any warnings, but if you see anything you think should, let us know.