Heaven is You

SIX

//Tw: panic attack//
//Time stamps matter//

The night is deep, the silvery moon is dotted with the dark blue night sky, and the naughty stars are running around her, chasing and playing. The stars will hold the moon.. and the moon will not be lonely tonight, quite unlike the abandoned heartbroken girl fallen to her knees on the sidewalk, crying.

Edward had driven off cancelling their date, but not before hurting the poor girl’s heart with this sharp words. Her petite and already tired body was now completely exhausted from crying ever since. Her eyes were red, cheeks tear stained and breaths, heavy. She had to try and calm herself down before it turns into a panic attack and go inside her house because capturing a distressed celebrity right on the road on a random night will be the perfect scoop for gossip sites.

She focused on taking deep breaths in and out through her mouth, feeling the air slowly fill her chest and belly and then slowly leaving them again. With eyes closed shut, she repeated this for a while until she felt herself calm enough to re-enter her house and not look suspicious to any family member that she might run into on the way to her room.

She wiped off all her tears, took out some compact from her purse, did a quick touch up and finger-combed her hair before making her way in into the snow-colored house.  She walked in as quietly as she could but a voice called out to her just as she reached the staircase.

“Sabrina? What are you doing home so early?” Shannon, the second oldest carpenter sibling questioned.

“Uh yeah, we had to cut short the date.” She replied with a small fake chuckle.

“Okay but it’s barely been an hour.. Did you guys have a fight or something?”

“What? No!” Sabrina exclaimed. “Umm Ed got an unexpected call from his manager saying that it was important for him to reach the dubbing studio right away. He requested for some more time but it was quite urgent so..” She quickly added, hoping her sister buys it and so happened.

“Oh I’m so sorry Brini..” Shannon said with a sad smile.

“Go get changed into your comfy pajamas then and we all can have dinner together!” She was quick to change the subject, with the hopes of cheering up her younger sister.

The blonde girl was beyond tired and just wanted to run up to her room and probably cry herself to sleep. She didn’t like missing family dinners as they didn’t get enough of those nights when none of them was working somewhere or the other. But what she disliked even more was faking her emotions in front of her sisters.

“Uh we actually went into a drive through so I’m full now. I feel really exhausted so I’m just gonna go to sleep.” She said, giving a convincing smile.

“Oh okay, no problem Brini, have some sweet sweet dreams!”

As soon as she reached her room, she locked the door and slowly slumped down against it and sat there bringing her knees closer to her chest. She sat in complete silence for a few minutes, cursing herself.

“Why do I always disappoint him?! He loves me and does so much for me but I always piss him off. All I had to do was dress up nicely for my boyfriend but I had to let my stupid PMS takeover my thinking and now I have ended up drowning in my own regrets. Ugh why do I keep fucking up! I’m the just a sad excuse for a girlfriend, Ed does not deserve me at all..”

Her words broke up and all she could say were now stuttering sounds. Hot tears streamed down her face, and she squeezed her eyelids shut in the hope that the tears would stop. Her choppy breathing and watery eyes remained for quite some time, and she sat there, unmoving.