you can hear it in the silence

Part Eight- December

hey! so sorry i didn't update for a couple days, i had an awful weekend! comments and votes mean the #world to me. let me know what you think <3

I shake my head, trying to focus on the biology assignment I have to finish by the end of the period. No matter how hard I focus, there's a nagging in the back of mind that tells me I'll never be good enough. Good enough for Zack, for my friends, for anyone. I guess for myself, too. It's fucking exhausting.

I take a bathroom pass, giving up on that worksheet. There's no way in hell I can finish in twenty minutes, so I'll just turn it in during lunch. I take a deep breath as I walk down the hall to the bathroom, rounding a corner to see a familiar figure talking with someone I vaguely recognize.

"Yeah, I lost it." Zack laughs. "That shit was hilarious." The girl he's with giggles, and she comes out of hiding from behind Zack's frame.

It's Kayla. As in Zack's ex Kayla. I immediately tense, taking cover behind a row of lockers so I can keep listening.

"Well, I should probably go back to history." Kayla says. "I wish I could just stay here, though."

"Me too." Zack sighs. "See you later."

Zack starts walking towards where I've hidden, so I sprint in the other direction until I get to the next bathroom. I lock myself in a stall, breathing heavily.

There was nothing wrong with being friends with your ex. And there wasn't anything romantic about that conversation, just small talk. It was totally fair that Kayla would rather talk to Zack than go back to history. And I know that Zack has AP Chem this period, so I would do anything to get out of that class, including staying and talking to my ex. This was fine.

I shake the water off my hands once I'm finished washing them, and someone walks up to the sink next to me.

"Hey." Kayla says, smiling. Her blonde hair goes down to her shoulders, complimenting her brown eyes. She's a little bit taller than me.

"Hey." I responded, a bit shocked. "Kayla, right?"

"Yeah. And you're Amelia." Kayla reapplies her lip gloss in the mirror before looking at me. "So I heard you and Zack are like, a thing now. And I just wanted to say I'm totally cool with it. We're just friends now."

"Cool?" I say. "Glad to hear it." Kayla just smiles at me, and saunters back into the hallway. I'm left in front of the bathroom, wondering what the hell happened in the last five minutes.

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"No, you should not come to the game on Saturday." Thomas said. "It will be extremely embarrassing."

"Well, I already told Zack I would go. So I'll be there." I tell him, smirking.

We're waiting for everyone else to get to the library on Friday, lounging in the study room. There was a championship soccer game on Saturday, and as we know, Thomas sucks at soccer. Nobody even knows how he made the team in the first place. 

"Fine. But don't expect me to be making any goals."

"If you don't make a goal, you have to pay for my coffee for the next two weeks." I challenge him.

"And why would I do that?" Thomas asks, fluffing his brown hair. It goes quite well with the lilac sweater he's wearing.

"Motivation, duh." I laugh.

"Well if I do score a goal, you have to wear my jersey to school on Monday." Thomas says. Thomas is quite a bit taller and broader than me, and his jersey is a bit roomy on him. I don't want to be swimming in his shirt on Monday, especially during my psych presentation. Not to mention the post-game sweat smell.