Sparks Went Flying

Chapter 19

Ellis POV

I can't do this. He doesn't want to see me, I tried and he said no. I don't want to face him. He broke my heart and than shattered it some more. I can't face him like this, maybe he will take pride in having such effect.

"C'mon you know you want to see him, and he wants to see you too, Ell. I won't make you, obviously, but I think it would be good. You guys can talk it out and figure out where your relationship should go. You guys need to sort out your feelings. Plus, I already told him we would so, don't make your favorite brother a liar, please?" He says, putting the guilt-trip in full motion.

"Why? Huh? He told me he doesn't want to see me, what more can you want? Do you want me to cry some more? Because that's what it's feeling like. It feels like you are choosing his side, not that I want you to choose sides, I want you to choose both of our sides. You can be his friend and ill be your sister. We don't need to be friends anymore, he obviously doesn't want to, I'm not forcing him." I say, on the verge of tears already.

God, why did this have to happen. I should have stayed away, my fears were right.

"Ells, I'm not choosing his side I just want you guys to be happy, and you were the happiest I have seen you since, y'know, when you were with him. Baby sis, you guys made each other happy. I know you love him and he loves yo-" he says but I cut him off.

"He doesn't love me anymore." I say simply as if my world hadn't just been crushed to pieces.

"He does. He told me everything, he told me to tell you that you were enough and that he loves you, Ell. He wants you back, he's dying over his drugged mistake. You gotta hear him out. I'm not saying you need to forgive him, or be with him again, I just want you to do what will make you happy because I love you too. I just want you happy. Okay?" He says, my eyes are already filled with tears.

He could be lying, he could be saying that to make me come face to face with him. But, what's the point? If he didn't mean it he wouldn't tell B that so, I don't know. I'm confused. I don't know how to feel. Should I go?

"I'll go, if you promise to leave when I want to." I say, needing some reassurance from being forced to stay.

"Okay. Now, go get ready. I want to leave here in about 5 minutes. Hurry up!" He says.

I rush up to my bedroom, determined to not look pathetic. I spent the day crying and sleeping. Sleep was the only way I could shut off my emotions long enough to have peace and quiet.

I throw on sweatshirt and some jeans. I make my hair look less frumpy. I add a little concealer around my eyes trying to cover up the redness.

"Ell, cmon we need to go!" I hear Brandyn yell from downstairs.

"Coming!" I yell back.

I grab my bag and head downstairs to put some sneakers on. In case I have to run away.

"Okay let's go, he's probably already there." He says and I nod silently, too nervous to speak at this point.

The whole way there my mind won't stop telling me this is a bad idea, that I'll only get hurt more. When we pull up I have a hard time getting out of the car. I sit in my seat, frozen.

"Cmon Elle, you know I won't let anything happen that you don't want. If you feel too uncomfortable at any point we'll leave, okay? So get your ass out the car and let's go." I don't move. "You can see Lily!" He says, and as soon as I hear about the sweet little girl I hesitantly get out.