An Unpredictable Universe

10. Kian: Wait For Me

 "Wait what really?" Sabrina questions, arching an eyebrow. Her eyes sparkled after I told her that Dr. Flora permitted me to have the responsibility to wheel her around the hospital.
Today's Thanksgiving, and mother is having some guests over at the house, which isn't to my comfort. I prefer it to be just my mother, me, and Harrison because then I can appreciate the moment more and be myself without the awkwardness of being around guests and other family members.
My mother usually invites several coworkers from her job, along with my uncle and my cousins. I despise enormous gatherings because I tend to have social anxiety. I always feel constant discomfort because there's a bunch of strangers and family members that you haven't seen since months ago, so I feel as if I can't be my usual self, and I'm obligated to put this mask on until they're gone.

"Yes, really! Are you excited for our adventure soon around the hospital," I exclaim while watching her pick at her food on the tray on her lap.
For the first time ever, she beamingly smiles so widely that I see her straight aligned teeth, and her eyes twinkle. I blush a bit too obviously, so I turn around for a moment to get my act together.
"What happened?"
"Oh! It's nothing! I just had a minor cough for a second," I stutter, and I turn around to face her once again.
The corners of her eyes crinkle and she giggles to herself.
"What?"
"Nothing, I'm just excited! I haven't been out of here in years ever since my last surgery in another room. When are you planning to wheel me out of here captain Kian?"
Sabrina salutes me, while grinning foolishly making my heart warm.
"I'm really excited too!"
A few moments later of silence, I break it by asking, "So how's your thanksgiving looking tonight?"
Sabrina's smile fades and she begins to nibble on her bottom lip. Oh, my did I say something wrong? Shit.
"Oh, well... My parents were supposed to visit me like they usually do every year. They customarily bring food from Boston market, and we all eat together in the room, but this year they couldn't come. Work I guess, but sometimes I think it's an excuse for them to not see me." She pauses and looks at her window. She does that a lot when she seems to be down.
" I'm like a burden to them. Every time they come here, it's a reminder that they have an ill child. That life isn't all rainbows and butterflies because I exist. I think they prefer to just live in their own lives and forget about me for their wellbeing," she continues.
"That's not true. I'm sure they don't view you in that way. You're they're only child. If anything, you make them happier. You're the light in their life."
She gives me a half-smile and weakly shrugs. If her parents can't convince her that they love her, I hope I can. She's special to me.
"Tonight, my parents are expecting guests at our house, but I dread to go home and spend time with them. I despise guests."
Sabrina glances at me and she pursues her lips. "I can see that, I guess. Still sounds nice to be able to have a thanksgiving though and eat a home cooked meal at a home." Good job Kian, you just made her feel worse and acted like an ungrateful brat towards your own life.
"Yeah, yeah of course! I mean, I'd invite you but uh you know you can't come. My mom actually invited you to come." Good job with your words Kian. Darien is right, I'm the expert of being a rambler.
Suddenly, Sabrina laughs so vigorously that she starts tearing up. Is this a sarcastic laugh? I can't tell? I'm confused? Why are girls so confusing.
" Kian you're adorable, you really have a way with your words. But That's really sweet of your mother. I'd really love to go ah," she says while twirling her index fingers around together. Some strands of hair fall down covering the side of her face as she lowers her head to look at her fingers. She's so precious. The little things she does, I've noticed.
"I mean yeah, thanks. Um, anyways I have to go attend to another patient. Oh, by the way."
I hand her a ripped piece of paper with my
phone number written on it.
"If you need anything, call me or text me," I resume.
"Yeah, totally thank you." Sabrina takes the piece of paper and I run off like sonic out of the room. I'm a sweaty mess.
Why is it so hard to communicate with her now? Every second, I'm worried that I'll say or do the wrong thing. This is horrible. I think I'm really starting to like her. I notice the little things she does, and it warms my heart and makes me feel so tender inside. I have this soft spot for her, the way I have one for Harrison.

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