DSMP Oneshots

Cooking Stream (Beeduo)

'Today I will be doing a cooking stream withhhhhh RANBOO!' Ranboo jumped into the frame, tackling Tubbo and wrapping his longs arms around his short body.
'Hello everyone! We will be baking a CAKE,' Ranboo says, letting go of his friend and beginning to gather the ingredients they needed. 'We don't have any instructions so we will be winging it! Is it a good idea? Probably not! Should I be letting Tubbo have any type of cutlery-style weapon? Also probably no! But are we going to do it anyway? Of course!'

Tubbo began to messily crack the eggs into a bowl, almost certainly dropping some shell into the mix. At least most of it was going into the bowl. Ranboo was measuring out the flour, infinitely more precise than Tubbo, carefully tipping the right amount of flour into the big mixing bowl. When Tubbo added his eggs, they splatters a bit up the sides, forming littles pools of yellow in the white flour.

'Tubbo, you measure out the sugar, remember to set the scales back to zero, and I'm going to clean up your mess, okay?' Ranboo asked, looking at his friend.
'On it, Bossman,' said Tubbo, quickly saluting him then doubling over when Ranboo tickled his stomach. 'No, no, no! Mercy, please, mercy!' he yelled as he rolled around on the floor, out of sight except from his legs waving in the air as Ranboo kneeled down next to him to tickle near his chin.

Ending his torture, Ranboo got up and tried his best to clean up the spilled eggs, dumping the shells in the bin with the paper towels he used. He turned round just in time to see what sugar Tubbo was using.

'No Tubbo! Wrong sugar!' he shouted, catching the small amount of grains that slipped out of the packet as Tubbo jumped in surprise at the raised voice.
'I thought there was only one type of sugar!' he pouted, putting down the bag he was holding.
'That's brown sugar, you use caster sugar in a cake.' Ranboo said, taking the packet from Tubbo and handing him the right one from the cupboard.
'Oh okay.' said Tubbo, measuring the right ingredient this time.

Ranboo went to the fridge, took out the margarine, and scooped the specified amount into the mixing bowl. He counted off the list of ingredients in his head on his fingers; thumb-eggs, index finger-flour, middle finger-sugar, ring finger-margarine. What had he forgotten? He knew there were six ingredients in the cake. Then he remembered. Baking powder, to make it rise-little finger, and cocoa powder, to make it all taste like chocolate-other thumb. Ranboo himself wasn't a huge fan of chocolate, but Tubbo loved it, so they had decided to make that type of cake, on the condition that Ranboo would take it in and out of the oven, as his friend wasn't allowed to touch it anymore, after he put spaghetti in the oven and it caught on fire.

Ranboo looked over at his friend, drawing shapes in the flour with his finger, but as it wasn't only flour in the bowl, his finger was getting extremely sticky. He rolled his eyes, and took two long strides over to Tubbo, picked him up by the armpits and turned his around to face him. His friend looked up at him, childishly small next to his giant friend. Ranboo just started laughing and Tubbo joined him, bending over almost in half, cackling loudly, not noticing the edge of the countertop and bashing his head comically.

'So chat, it's obviously going great!' Ranboo said to the camera, mask moving too much just to be talking, as Tubbo staggered in the background, holding onto the counter.

When they finally got all of the ingredients in the mixing bowl, Tubbo adding way to much cocoa powder, they realised they hasn't greased the pans. As Ranboo smeared butter on the trays, Tubbo was playing around with the mix, dipping his finger into the batter and swirling it around.
He finished greasing the pans and Tubbo helped him put the mix into the trays, then Ranboo put the two metal pans into the oven and Tubbo set a timer.

As the cakes baked, Ranboo and Tubbo talked to the chat, answering questions and thanking donations.
When the timer went off, Ranboo put on the gloves again and carefully pulled the trays out of the oven. They were perfectly done and as they cooled Tubbo helped him make the icing. Again, he put in too much cocoa powder, trying to claiming it was the right amount. They spread it extremely unevenly in the middle, and pronounced it done.

'What do you think, chat? Should we try it?' asked Ranboo. 'I mean, you can watch Tubbo eat it, because eating it through my mask would be pretty difficult, y'know?'
'Yah, let's try it!' shouted Tubbo excitedly, rummaging around in a draw for a knife. When he found one, he hacked at the cake choppily. After placing two large slices onto separate plates, he handed one to Ranboo, who walked off camera to take off his mask and enjoy the cake.

Tubbo dug into his with gusto, gobbling it like he hadn't eaten in days.
'This is so good, isn't it King!' he exclaimed.
Ranboo nodded , but realising the viewers couldn't see him he said, 'Yeh it's great, Tubbo and I should bake more often.' The chat started to spam, and Ranboo, behind the camera, tried to read what was being said. As he did, he looked extremely angry, typing rather than saying out-loud to the mods to change the chat to emote-only, to prevent Tubbo from reading it, but he had his phone, and with the lull of donations to thank, he decided to check the chat on his device. Ranboo watch as Tubbo's happy smile was wiped off his face as quickly the cake from his plate. Tears began to fall from his eyes are he quickly tried to wipe them away, but they were coming faster than he could try to hide them. Ranboo's heart was breaking. He frantically tapped buttons, ending the stream. When he was sure the camera was off, he rushed to Tubbo, holding him in his arms as he sobbed uncontrollably. Ranboo was trying to calm him, but all he was thinking about was how he wanted to wrap his hands around those peoples necks'.
'Tubbo...? Tubbo...? Tubbo...?' Ranboo said softly, trying to peak at the crying boy's face on his chest. 'It's okay, it's okay, don't listen to them! You are fine! You are perfect! Don't listen to those whores!!'
Tubbo only sniffled, tears and snot staining the front of Ranboo's shirt, but he did not care, because his 'fans' had called his friend 'Chubbo' and he wanted them to pay.
When Tubbo seemed to have calmed down a bit, Ranboo tried to talk to him again.
'Don't listen to them, okay? You can eat all the cake you want and no one is going to mind.' Ranboo said, trying to console Tubbo.
'B-b-but they obviously d-do!' cried Tubbo, stuttering in his misery.
'No no no they don't! Think of all your mods and all your loyal fans! They don't care! I don't care!' Ranboo almost screamed. He stood up, pried Tubbo off him, and walked over to the table. He delicately cut the cake, trying to smooth off Tubbo's uneven cutting, and put the slice on a plate, then brought it over to Tubbo, slipping him a fork to not make as much mess. He raised his eyes at his friend, who slowly cut a piece off and put it to his mouth. Ranboo sat back down again, rubbing Tubbo's back as he ate another slice of cake. When he had finished,
'Feeling better now?' Ranboo asked when he had finished. Tubbo nodded.
'I'm going to bed now.' he said.
'Okay.' Ranboo agreed, reaching for his phone. He unlocked it as Tubbo exited the room. He navigated to Twitch, logged in, and started to go through the stream chat, meticulously banning every single user who had called Tubbo that name. It was going to be a long night, but it would be worth it.

(1384 words)