My names Alisa, But you can call me Ali!, Im 17 I live in England, I go to college doing public services I want to be a police woman when im older, People say I have the perfect life, living in a big house! getting whatever I wanted, I don't my parents had a divorce three years ago, that broke me apart, even tho I still go and visit my dad every weekend as he lives only a couple of miles away, it's just not the same as it used to be, hes now re-married and got another kid he cares more about than us, his wife has another kid thats 19, hes called Jack, I have a brother aswell who's 19 called Chris they get along well and hang around with each other at college, they both do public services they want to go into the army when they are both older, my mum still hasn't found the man for her but she won't give up, and me? Im just on my own, im not ready to be with anyone, yeah I like this boy but that don't matter
I flutter my eyes open revealing my plain white walls, its a basic bedroom, its got my kingsize bed with my red sheets, my computer table, chester draws, slide robes, dressing table ect.. I chuck the blanket off me feeling the cold air touch my body, I softly place both my feet on the ground rubbing them on the carpet below them before pulling myself out of bed, I make my way over to my bathroom door that enters me into my black and white bathroom, I walk over to my bath tub I put the plug in the plug hole and let the hot water run whilst I go back into my bedroom and grab the glass from my bedside table, I wonder back into my bathroom and walk over to the sink, I fill the glass of water and grab over to get my tablets, I put them both into my mouth and rest them on my lips, I bring the water to my mouth and swallow the anti-depressents, I examine my face, why do I look like this? Why can't I be pretty, or have a perfect body? why does everyone hate me? where have I gone wrong? I just want to be perfect, thats never going to happen! Im never going to be perfect, I walk back over to my bath and stop the hot water, I put the cold on the waters perfect for me to get into, I put my glass of water back on the counter, I go and lock my bathroom door and start to undress to get into my bath, Why am I so fat? Im so flat chested, Is this why no boys ever like me? and why they never will? I always had these thoughts going through my mind, I stopped the cold water and got into my bath, I layed down to wet my hair and place shampoo on, I washed it out then put conditioner on I left the conditioner on and grabbed my razor to have a shave, then after I slowly placed it to my wrist and held down, I slowly glided it across my arm untill blood started pouring out, I did it again, the pain was excrutiating but it was addictive, these scars are not going to help me with anything I know, but its addictive, and I just can't stop, I put the razor back on the tub and carefully wash the conditioner out of my hair trying not to get my fresh wounds into the water, I put shower gel all over my body and wash it all off, I climb out of the tub, I reach for the closest towl and wrap it around me, I walk over to my door and unlock it, I walk into my open bedroom and the coldness hits me again, I walk over to my slidrobes I grab out my black longsleeve batman top, black skinnies, pants and bra, I get changed quickly still being careful of my cuts, I walk over to my bedroom door and walk out into the landing I go down the flight of stairs and straight into the kitchen I grabbed chicken nuggets, chicken burger, chips, waffles and beans!
"Ali, please tell me you are not eating all of that?" My mum comes behind me with a shocked tone
"Yeah, Im bliming hungry!"
"Don't waste any tho! I hate it when people waste food" My mum scolded
"Yeah, Ali no wasting food you know it gets on mums tits!" My brother chris mocked
"Chris, less of that please!" My mum also scolded
"But where the Fu....Hell does she store it all?" My brother almost swears
"Well in my stomach stupid!!" I mock
"I know that, but your'e so skinny"
"Your'e brother is correct there! When was the last time you weighed yourself Ali?" My mums voice went all panicky
"Im a healthy 11 stone, I weighed myself the other day and I was 11 stone so there is no need to worry at all, I am a very healthy 11 stone" I rushed out! I grabbed my now cooked food and put them all on a plate and ran up the stairs locking my bedroom door behind me, I stuff my face full of all my food, once im finished I place my plate on my dressing table and walk into the bathroom, I pull the toilet seat up and kneal on the floor next to it, I put my two fingers to my mouth slowly, I feel them go past my tounsils and past the bit that makes you vomit, I can feel it all coming up I put both my hands on the toilet seat and make sure my hair is all back, then I vomit all in the toilet, It keeps occuring till my stomach is empty again, I grab some tissue and wipe my mouth then i grab some more and wipe the toilet sides I put the seat back down and stand up, I look at my pale reflection in my mirror I grab my tooth brush and toothpaste and brush my teeth to get rid of the vomit taste, I go back into my bedroom and lay on my bed before I go into a little day dream!
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Hey this is my new story, I hope you like it!
Let me know what you think please?:)
