You're Insecure

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- Your POV-
As you wake up and let the sun hit your eye lids, you turn to the other side and face Herbert, sleeping peacefully beside you. You hear little snores which it's really cute coming from him.
You- carefully, get up from the bed and head to the bathroom to do your business, brush your teeth. While brushing your teeth, you look at yourself, looking at every flaw that is visible to you, but invisible to Herbo.
He see's you as some queen, high up on a throne. The true definition of beauty. Every time you were insecure, he made you feel the opposite. Secure. All because he knew that you had body dysmorphia and, because he loves you.
You kept staring and staring until you couldn't stare anymore! That's when you stopped brushing and went into the shower.
While drying off, you were so tempted to pull down the towel from your body and look at yourself again.
" I am so ugly." You say whispering to yourself. The sad expression soon covered your face, you didn't do anymore but lotion down and put on another set of pajamas then go back to bed.
You lay down, sinking the side of the bed, letting your thoughts cloud your mind- all negative thoughts. "Good morning, baby"
Herbert says while groaning. You didn't say anything. If 𝙖𝙣𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙜, you felt even more sad when he called you'd "baby. " So, you didn't even bother to respond.
" Y/N, I know you hear me sayin' good morning to yo big headed self. " That was his way of showing you love. However, you didn't want that. "Leave me alone. " You say.
" Man, what's wrong?" He says smacking his teeth while being concerned. Typical Herbert.
" Are you on yo period?" He asks you because sometimes, you do act like this while being on your period.
" Please leave. " Your voice cracks in the middle of that sentence, so that gave away everything that was wrong with you. You begin to put your body fully under the covers. Making sure not one inch of you is visible to Herbert.
" Baby, look, you're so pretty and beautiful to me, girl. I love all your curves, your thighs, smile, personality and everything about you. "
"BUT IM FAT, HERBERT!! NOTHING IS "PRETTY"
OR "BEAUTIFUL" ABOUT ME. IM UGLY." You said all of this while ripping the covers off of you aggressively and shouting through your tears. You wanted him to get- feel what you're saying to him.
He thinks you're beautiful inside and out but that isn't what you see. You see ugliness. Whenever you view yourself, You're abhorrent. Why doesn't he understand this? "Why can't you understand that i'm ugly? Everyone says I'm such a pretty girl but I am not, Herbert, I'm not. "
At this point, all Herbert could do was sigh and scoop you up into his loving arms. He kissed your forehead while you let everything all out. " Let it out, mama, let it out. " He says calmly. At least he was there for you, because during your childhood, you struggled with the same thing but the only difference is that your parents got annoyed at you nagging about your appearance. You can say, everything leading up to know is finally coming out in your tears.
" You are my world, baby. Believe that. I understand that you're insecure but there's no reason for you to be, love. You're so funny, amazing, cute and... precious..." He takes his time on the last one. "You're eyes are so beautiful, babe. I love you so, so, so much, girl. " he says while stroking your arms and repeatedly, kissing your neck.
" I don't feel beautiful, Herbo. I am a mess!!" You say while straining your voice a little in a whisper tone.
" Y/N, you're beautiful, baby. you're everything I could ever want. All those other girls 𝙬𝙞𝙨𝙝 they were you. To the smile, the pretty brown, big eyes, the gorgeous figure and everything else, Y/N. "
" You really mean it?" You say, quietly.
" Yes. " Herbert finishes. He really wanted and 𝙣𝙚𝙚𝙙𝙚𝙙 you to understand that you're a precious jewel and if anyone did not ever tell you that again, he wanted you to know. from him. that you are, precious.
You let that last sentence sink in before you kissed him back and realize for yourself that you are very, very beautiful.

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