Focused Dreams

Chapter 17

Sitting at my desk and trying to ignore the pounding in my head is not how I expected to pass my day.

I woke up this morning, still mortified by the events that happened three days ago. Having Damien in a room I designed especially to escape people was a surprise. My reacting to my mother's letter that way was also a surprise. But being surprised isn't anything new in my line of work, which means I shouldn't have reacted the way I did, and I shouldn't have done the things I did.

It seems that having Damien around has proven to be an inconvenience. He's bringing up emotions in me that should be kept locked away. And yet whenever he's around it's like everything just becomes too hard to bare. Seeing him in a way brings me hope, hope that having a relationship in this business might work out.

And that's exactly why it's dangerous to be so close to him. I know better than to get close to people. I've learned early on what risks this job comes with. How someone close to me could be so easily manipulated, and used against me? Even if it wasn't part of my father's many lessons, I would have known it. My mother's death is a grand example of all this.

Speaking of relationships I try to keep to the minimum, I suddenly get a facetime request from Catie. She's not going to be back until the gala, so our talks have been to a minimum, but we still manage to make time at night for our wine talks.

'Hey, sweetie. How's everything going.' Catie's voice zings through the phone and immediately I forget about all my problems.

'Hi.' I smile wide, 'Everything is going well with the gala. I've had some help'

Catie's smile instantly turns mischievous, 'I've heard. And how is our old friend doing.'

Not wanting to talk about Damien, and have to tell her about the incident a few days ago, I try to switch topics, 'What do you mean you've heard? Who told you.'

A rare blush overtakes her face. I haven't seen her blush like that since high school, 'I have my ways.' She says, 'Stop trying to change the topic. Has anything happened yet that I'm supposed to be concerned about?'

This time is my turn to blush, 'No...'

Her smile is beaming through the screen, but her voice is accusing, 'Lucinda Allen D'Ambrosio, tell me what happened, and tell me what happened now.'

Giving up on trying to hide it from her I start with the easiest part, 'Well you know how I texted you about Roma and my mother's letters?'

'Yes,' Her eyes go soft, 'Are you sure you're okay about all that?'

'Yeah, yeah,' I try to brush it off and continue with what I was saying, 'Well I kind of went into my room at the office and balled my eyes out.'

The concern from her radiates through the screen, 'Oh, honey.'

'Yeah, but that's not the worst part,' I take in a deep breath, 'Damien kind of saw me.'

I hear a sharp inhale from my phone, 'He didn't.' I nod my head, embarrassed, 'What did he do?'

'He... kind of helped me through it, we started talking, and I got tired and fell asleep.' I say sheepishly, and Catie's awws fill the room. 'Still wasn't the worst of it.'

Catie rolls her eyes, 'If you tell me he gave you a teddy bear or something we might want to reevaluate your description of the word worst.'

'No, nothing like that,' I pause trying to think of a way to tell her, 'Wealmostkissed.' I slurred the words together, but she must have understood me quite well.

'WHAT?!' she shouts so loud that I worry someone might have heard her on her end. 'How could you not tell me! When was this?' 

'It was the same day...' I whisper as I start to feel my face heat up.